


Don the Suit

by isobelx



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben Solo has a crush on Rey, Ben Solo loves Christmas, Christmas Reylo, F/M, Fluff, Grinch Rey, Inspired By The Santa Clause (Movies), Lonely Ben Solo, Not Beta Read, Rey doesn't believe in Santa, Romantic Fluff, Slight barely there angst, The Santa Clause AU, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Uncle Ben Solo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:28:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 30,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28137705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isobelx/pseuds/isobelx
Summary: Inspired by @reylo_promptsBen Solo accidentally kills Santa and finds himself being subject to the "Santa Clause", now he has to get his affairs in order and get married before next Christmas comes along.Rey Kenobi is the headmistress at Ben's niece's school, she used to love Christmas. She doesn't anymore.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo
Comments: 4
Kudos: 26





	1. The one with the dead Santa

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Karouh](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Karouh).



> This is my christmas gift to my best friend in the whole world, flove you mate.  
> I hope it doesn't suck.  
> :)

He could have sworn he turned off his alarm last night.

The incessant beeping of his god forsaken mobile had pulled him from a particularly vivid, and incredibly pleasing dream involving the headmistress from his niece’s school.

Yes, he knew something was very wrong with him.

He had only met the woman once before. A brief encounter in which he had managed to make a complete fool of himself before he even learned her name.

In his defence, that other girl’s father was saying some nasty things about Amy and Kay, and Ben would not allow that. No wonder the daughter was such nightmare, she must be, how could she not? when her father was such an arsehole.

He finally took his phone from his crowded bedside table, almost knocking down a glass of water in the process. He answered just before the call was sent to voicemail.

“Hello?” he answered in his groggy I-just-got-out-of-bed voice.

“Benjamin for fucks sake it’s 10:30 in the morning, did I seriously wake you?” his sister’s voice admonished through the speaker.

Ben just growled as an answer. That just added to the annoyance in Kay’s voice.

When Ben was five years old, Kaydell’s biological parents had died in a car accident. Amilyn, her mother, had been Ben’s mother’s best friend since kindergarten, so Leia didn’t hesitate to take the young girl in when she was left all alone.

“Ben… I know it’s a bit sudden but, could you meet me for coffee in an hour at the usual place? I need to talk to you about something important” Kay asked shyly.

“Of course” was his immediate answer.

“Thank you” her voice sounded exhausted.

Ben then heard her muffled voice talking to someone in the background, and the obvious crackling sound her lab coat made when she pressed her phone against it.

“Ben, I have to go. See you in an hour” and just like that the phone call was finished.

Benjamin Solo had not planned to get up from his cozy, ultra-comfortable bed today. Ever since his last book deal went dead, he was having trouble finding a reason to do so every morning. But whenever Kaydell called, he would always answer. And if she could make the effort of taking the time to have coffee with him it meant whatever she needed was important. Therefore, he had to be there.

When his sister was still in med school, her sorority house had caught fire, it was severe enough that they had to call the fire department.

That was when Kaydell crossed paths with Cal Ketsis.

The young fireman had made the girl feel something she had never felt before. Him and his teammates helped her and her sorority sisters through the shock of the ordeal, earning their eternal gratitude and, for Cal, Kay’s number.

They dated for almost two years before getting married, a move Leia disapproved but didn’t oppose to. It was her belief that Kay should finish school before committing to someone.

The pair were too in love to wait.

It was a fairy-tale wedding, followed a year later by the birth of a healthy beautiful young girl. They had the perfect life. Han and Leia gifted the young couple with a house in the suburbs, not far from where they grew up. Kay would leave every morning for work with a kiss from both her husband and daughter, and come back late at night, tired from the hospital, and have her spirit lifted by her little family.

All that came to an end one Friday afternoon, at about six-thirty. The fire department answered a call about a fire that broke at a factory, right out of town. At least a dozen workers were trapped inside, Cal was one of the firemen that went in to save them.

He didn’t make it out.

Ben stared at his reflection in the mirror over his bathroom sink. The dark circles under his eyes were refusing to disappear, no matter how much sleep he got. His hair could use a wash, and he couldn’t remember when was the last time that he changed his sweatshirt.

He was fresh out of college when the powers that be decided to publish his first novel. Some said it was the accomplishment of a lifetime. Other declared him the most promising young writer of the last century. It was an engaging story, with multi-layered characters that seemed to jump from the page when you read about them. Like, somehow, they were real.

That was the brilliance of Ben’s work, his characters were far from perfect. And in that he found perfection.

Amazing reviews were published, a book tour was talked about. The publishing house made him a contract for three books, with an option to expand even further.

But he failed to produce a second book.

The deadline came and went, and Ben could not find the words to continue his story. Every day that passed he struggled more and more until one day he received the call that had landed him where he was. His contract would be rescinded, he had to give back the money he had been given in advance. 

That had been five months ago.

Ben walked into the shower eager to get the smell of fast food and sweat from his skin. The hot water ran down his chest taking with it some of his sorrow.

_Get it together Solo._ Ben reprimanded himself. He was still in the shower when his phone rang again. He braved the cold from outside the shower stall to take his phone and see who was calling.

Kay again.

“Ben?” her rushed voice alerted Ben that something was wrong.

“Yeah?”

“I’m so sorry, I know I just called to ask you to meet but a patient just arrived and I’m going into surgery in a couple of minutes… I don’t know how long I’ll be”

“You want me to pick up Amy from school” Ben said, more an affirmation than a question.

“Well… yeah… that would be great… also…” hesitation was something unusual in her, always so confident and sure of herself.

“What happened?” Ben wondered aloud.

“I lost the shift draw and I’m going to have to cover Christmas eve… and Christmas morning” she explained defeated, her voice cracking a little in the end.

“Oh” was all Ben thought to say.

“I’m sorry… I’ll explain later I have to go. Please give Amy a kiss from me” and she hung up.

++++++++++

Ben couldn’t stop his leg from bouncing up and down as he sat outside Amy’s school to wait for her. He had made the foolish decision of drinking a large can of Red-Bull before leaving his, afraid he might fall asleep at the wheel.

Now he was afraid his heart might explode.

The large red-brick building was an imposing sight. Resembling more a castle than a school, Ben often wondered why his mother insisted that Kay had to go there. When Amy was old enough to start school, Leia had given her young parents an extremely convincing argument as to why she must attend that school in particular. After Cal died and money began to be a little tight, Han and Leia had almost begged Kay to allow them to pay for the girl’s education.

The distant ring of the bell signalling the end of last period made his legs move at their own accord and he stood from the bench so fast his head went a little dizzy.

A swarm of children of different ages burst through the front doors less than a minute later.

“Uncle Ben!!” the little voice bellowed from behind a plump redheaded boy with a particularly hideous bowl haircut.

“Hey little one!” Ben greeted her while picking her up to spin her around and hug her tight. “Ready to go home?” he asked, and the girl squeaked in excitement.

It was, after all, the last day of school before Christmas break. She had a full three weeks of relaxation at home before she would have to come back. Not that school was a stressful affair for the six-year-old.

They spent the entire afternoon at the shopping centre. Ben still had to do his Christmas shopping, an activity that he enjoyed too much to be considered normal. This year he still hadn’t got to it yet. However, since he loved spending time with his niece, he decided to tackle the task that day.

Once they got all the gifts on the list, Ben and Amy stopped for some food on their way home. Her favourite Mexican restaurant was only a couple of blocks away from his place and they had takeout. Amy practically inhaled her enchiladas. The tolerance of the little girl to spicy food never ceased to impress Ben.

He helped her with her homework so she would have a free holiday and then they worked on her letter to Santa.

This was Ben’s favourite part.

He had never told anyone before, out of fear of being ridiculed, but he was convinced he had once seen Santa Claus outside his window.

Of course, the only one who believed him at the time had been Kaydell, but even she started doubting it after a while. Ben stopped talking about it, but he never changed his story. He _saw_ something, and that something could only be one thing.

That fuelled his love for Christmas up until this day. His favourite holiday by far. Christmas meant happiness for Ben, a time for peace and relaxation. A time of joy.

“Do you think Santa can bring me a pony?” she asked with a serious face.

“I’m not sure Santa brings live animals little one”

She seemed slightly disappointed, but the pony was quickly forgotten when she remembered the one thing she had practically been begging her mother to get her all year long.

“I think I want a bike” she said with finality. Putting it on the blanc sheet of paper in that shaky handwriting of hers. She signed her letter and closed it, then putting it inside a pink envelope.

“Good choice” Ben answered with both thumbs up, making the little girl giggle.

Kaydell arrived a couple of hours later, her hair plastered to her head from being under the surgical hat for so long, dark circles under her eyes that had never truly left her since the first semester of med school, and an expression of complete and utter exhaustion.

She walked into Ben’s home and plumped onto the sofa, her head leaning back, her arm across her eyes protecting them from the warm light of the living room.

“How was she?” Kaydell asked.

“She was great, as always. She missed you” Kay winced visibly, and Ben felt guilty for mentioning it to her. “Sorry” he apologized.

“It’s alright… it’s not a lie” she sighed and straightened up, like she did when she was gathering strength to give bad news to a patient’s family. “Fucking Christmas shift” she said while she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

“Don’t worry, I’ll think of something to make it special”

“And this had to happen precisely the same year mum and dad decided to rekindle their marriage with a second honeymoon over Christmas break, fucks sake” she leaned back again and groaned. The weight of the world on her shoulders, and not for the first time Ben wished he could share it with her.

They put Amy in her car seat without waking her and Kay drove away leaving Ben alone in his apartment.

++++++++++

At 6:25 a.m on Christmas eve, Ben parked his black silencer outside Kay’s house, exactly five minutes before it would too late for her to leave the house and still be at the hospital in time.

They shared a quick hug and wished each other a happy Christmas. Kay jumped into her car and drove away to spend the rest of the day breathing recycled air inside the sterilized operating room. The only light she would see would be that from the fluorescent lamp over the operating table.

Ben fell asleep five minutes after Kay left. Slumped on the sofa, the enormous man looked out of place trying to fit in the minimalistic two-seater.

“Uncle Ben, wake up!” Amy yelled too close to his ear for comfort, startling him and making him jump out of his seat.

“Damnit munchkin” he complained between chuckles “You almost gave me a heart attack”

The girl squealed and laughed when Ben lifted her and threw her over his shoulder.

He made a stack of pancakes large enough to feed four large men, then he poured some hot chocolate in two large mugs and sprinkled the tiny marshmallows Amy loved so much on top. Ben was determined to make the day a special one for his niece.

With her father gone, her grandparents away and her mother working, the girl relied on Ben to make Christmas memorable.

They went ice skating, then they took his childhood sledge to the small hill behind his parent’s house. They walked around the small Christmas market downtown and bought some hot chocolate for her and mulled wine for him.

By the time the sun was going down, Amy had laughed so much her tummy was sore, and her heart was bursting with happiness.

“Uncle Ben we need to leave biscuits!!” Amy exclaimed while she ran back and forth from the kitchen to the living room, carrying different treats she liked to leave for the man in the red suit.

“Mummy says I only have to get milk and biscuits, but we don’t know what kind he likes! What if he can’t drink dairy? Or what if he doesn’t like chocolate?”

“I’m sure someone would know if Santa was lactose intolerant little one, and I don’t know… he doesn’t strike me as a fussy eater” Ben reassured her.

“Still, can’t take any chances”

Amy placed an assortment of at least ten different kinds of biscuits. Two glasses, one with whole milk, the other with oat. Then she got a bunch of crisps out and set them on a plate.

“I’m sure Santa likes salty things too; he must get tired of all the sweets─” she mumbled under her breath as she continued her work.

When she finished, both the side table and the coffee table were filled with food. She straightened some of the tree’s lights that she considered were misplaced and then with a triumphant voice she declared the room ready for Santa to arrive.

She scratched the back of her head with both hands and Ben knew she was ready to go to bed.

“Ready for bed miss? You know if you stay up, he won’t leave any presents” he said in his most convincing tone. However, if the girl’s yawn was any indication, she wouldn’t need much convincing to go to bed

He settled in the guest’s room, too tired to do anything but stare at the ceiling. His mind was focused on a pair of beautiful hazel eyes when he finally drifted off to sleep.

++++++++++

A loud bang on the roof jolted him awake.

Not wasting any time, he got up and looked for the one weapon he was sure his brother-in-law had in the house.

A baseball bat.

He ran out of the room with the bat held high. Turned on the light at the top of the stairs and looked around in case someone was already inside.

The noise was heard again, this time close to the window by the stairs. It was coming from the roof. He covered the distance to the window in two steps, opened it wide in one swift movement and hit someone.

Someone yelped.

The yelp was followed by a loud thud. And then, silence.

Ben froze for a few seconds, expecting to hear a string of expletives thrown his way, or at least the sound of who he was certain had to be a robber, running away. But nothing came.

“Oh fuck…” he said to himself.

He ran downstairs and opened the door to the backyard, only to find a large man with white hair and a long ass beard sprawled over the lawn, wearing what looked like a weird attempt at a Santa Claus suit.

He was pretty sure a neck should not bend that way.

“Oh god… oh my god” he ran his fingers through his hair and began pacing around the man.

He kneeled beside him and tried to find a pulse.

Could not find one.

“Oh god… I killed him…” Ben whispered to himself. His whole body shivered; he felt a wave of cold wash over him when the realisation of what had happened hit him. He had killed someone.

“Uncle Ben?” Amy’s voice came from the backdoor.

“Oh shit” he ran to close it before she saw anything, but he was too late.

“Uncle Ben? You there?” Amy gasped. Her eyes grew like saucers when she caught a glimpse of the man laying on the backyard, before being hauled inside by an alarmed Ben Solo.

“Was that santa?” she asked, so worried Ben just wanted to lay down and cry.

“I─ ”

“You killed SANTA???” she yelled, and Ben’s first reaction was to cover her little mouth. Last thing he wanted was to get the neighbours involved so soon.

“Shhhhh, please Amy… he fell off the roof”

“Is he dead?” this time she sounded calmer. She must’ve seen the alarm in Ben’s eyes.

Ben sat down and covered his face with his hands, praying it was all a bad dream and he would wake to open presents with little Amy and wait for Kay.

“Where did he go?” Amy asked from the door to the backyard.

Ben stood quickly, his last glimmer of hope that the man was not dead reignited.

But the large man with the snow-white bushy beard didn’t stand up and leave. He vanished, leaving behind only the enormous red suit, placed exactly where his body had been minutes ago.

“He disappeared” she said approaching the suit, eager to touch something that belonged to the real Santa Claus. Because to Amy it was clear. That man had been the real Santa.

“Don’t touch it Amy” Ben whispered.

“Do you think there’s a backup Santa?” she asked looking up ant her increasingly anxious uncle.

“What?” Ben asked, and he finally leaned down to inspect the red suit that was left behind. He convinced himself there was nothing to fear now. _No body, no crime, right?_

“Well, someone has to deliver the presents” Amy said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Ben was checking the pockets of what had to be at least a size 54 suit. He found candy canes, and a couple of biscuits, but nothing else. Until he checked the pocket inside the jacket. There he found a card, roughly the size of normal business card.

It was red and right at the middle, in beautifully handwritten golden letters:

‘If something should happen to me, put on my suit. The reindeer will know what to do’

“Reindeer?” he whispered, and uncle and niece looked up at the same time. They both gasped when they saw eight large reindeer floating close to the roof, attached to them was an enormous wooden sleigh, its sides were painted a deep shade of red, with golden details shimmering under the moonlight.

“You should put on the suit and finish delivering the presents” Amy said, her eyes never leaving the magnificent group of beasts.

“What?”

“You killed Santa!” she exclaimed.

“Did not!” 

“Yes, you did”

Ben stared at the red suit on the ground, it looked like a deflated balloon just waiting to be filled. Then he stared at the reindeer who were now looking at them too.

The sleigh was what made him make up his mind.

At the back of it was a large purplish bag, tied with a thick golden rope. The bag seemed to be filled with boxes. Presents. If Ben didn’t do anything, a lot of children would wake up to a tree without presents. He couldn’t let that happen.

He could help that night and deliver the presents and then everyone at the north pole could figure out what to do next.

_This is insane._

He looked at Amy and nodded, she understood immediately and took his hand. He picked up the suit and they walked into the house.

Ready to save Christmas.


	2. The one where everything wasn't a nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The adventure continues

_I have a bad feeling about this_

That was the first thought that crossed Ben’s mind the moment they boarded the sleigh. He had put on the suit and, despite it being much too large for him when he found it, the moment he put it on it fit like a glove. As if by magic.

It was the weirdest most unbelievably vivid dream Ben had ever had. In his whole life.

After he put on the suit and hopped into the sleigh, the reindeer took him and little Amy around every house in their town, and then they were taken to other cities. He would take the bag of presents and the thing would just float him into the house he was visiting.

It was madness. Obviously, he was experiencing an extremely Christmas-themed lucid dream.

He was driving the sleigh after delivering the last gifts to kids in what he was sure was Hawaii, when he asked the reindeer to take them home. Amy was fast asleep in the back of the sleigh, having made a bed with the gift bag. It was time to wake up in their own bed and get back to reality. Exhausted, he sat back and got comfortable, letting sleep wash over him.

It was the bumpy landing that woke him.

He opened his eyes, still a little groggy with sleep. The amount of snow surrounding him vanished his exhaustion.

They were not back in Chandrila. He wasn’t in his sister’s guest room.

The reindeer were leading them into what looked like an ice cave, he looked at the back of the sleigh and Amy was still fast asleep, cuddled underneath the bag of presents. A pair of red lights tinkled at the bottom of the cave, some children where waving them around. Much like people at airports lead airplanes to their hangars.

When the sleigh finally stopped, an army of children began unhooking the reindeer.

“Good morning Santa” someone said beside him.

Ben jumped in his seat when he saw who was staring at him with a huge smile. They were not children, at least they did not look like children up-close. They were child-sized adults, Ben just stared, his mouth agape, and acknowledged the little person with a nod of the head.

“Did you just call me ‘Santa’?” he finally said.

“Well… yeah. You are wearing the suit. That makes you Santa. Anyway, we need you to sign that you arrived and had no accidents during landing. It’s for our records”

Ben had no idea what was happening. This dream was fast becoming one of the weirdest experiences of his life. There was no way this whole thing was real.

“Hello” Amy said in her little voice from behind Ben’s head.

“Hello there!” The little man said “I’m Poe, nice to meet you” he extended his hand and Amy shook it without hesitation.

“You are an elf?! You help Santa make the toys!!” She both asked and stated excitedly.

Ben started pinching himself hoping it would wake him from this weird Christmas-themed inception-like dream of his. He was sure he had gone to sleep. And now he was almost sure he was awake. Although it was not possible. Surely, he hadn’t really killed Santa… did he?

“Why did you call me Santa?” Ben asked before Poe could answer Amy’s excited remark.

“Well…” he answered pointing at the suit Ben was wearing.

“This does not mean anything, it said to put it on if something happened to the real Santa, so I did to help out. That’s it”

Poe stared at him for a few seconds, like he was trying to make up his mind about something. Silently examining Ben’s face, looking for any indication the man was lying.

“You didn’t read the card, did you?” Poe asked.

“Yes! I just told you! It said something about putting it on if something happened to the other Santa!” Ben answered, rummaging through the pockets of the Santa jacket to find the card in question. Slowly losing his patience.

He liked Christmas. No, he LOVED Christmas. But this dream was a bit too much. He finally found the slip of paper and offered it to Poe, who took it at once.

“I mean… you didn’t read the fine print” he said, a hint of sadness in his voice. He produced a small magnifying glass from his pocket and showed the card to Ben.

This time, what Ben had thought was a golden outline at the edges of the card, was now clearly very small print with a text that said: ‘In putting on the suit and entering the sleigh, the wearer waives any and all rights to any previous identity, real or implied, and fully accepts the duties and responsibilities of Santa Claus in perpetuity until such time that wearer becomes unable to do so by either accident or design.’

Ben felt numb.

“Uncle Ben you’re going to be the next Santa!” Amy cried from behind him. Sue then hugged him by the neck so tightly, Ben hoped for a second it would be enough to make him pass out so he could wake up in his bed.

“I don’t… I mean… this must be a mistake” Ben mumbled, his confusion getting the best of him.

“No mistake, you put on the suit” Poe declared.

“But… I don’t want to be Santa” Ben stated, hanging on to what he thought might be his last trace of sanity.

A collective gasp startled him; he hadn’t even noticed they were surrounded by little people. All the tiny adults were staring at him with a mix of horror and despair. Ben had assumed they would have a backup plan in case the current Santa decided to forgo his duties. He couldn’t imagine a system so stupid it relied only on the good will of an unsuspecting bystander in case the man, who was clearly the boss, was… incapacitated.

“But then… there will be no presents for anyone. Everyone will be so sad” Amy said with that tiny sad voice that could always convince Ben to do anything.

“Amy…” Ben warned, aware his defences were crumbling.

“Uncle Ben… the elves need us. We must help! This is an honour. You love Christmas! Now you get to be the real Santa! Please uncle Ben… please…” she pleaded with her best puppy eyes and Ben couldn’t say no.

After all, it was only a dream. Right?

Poe led them through a massive factory. Hundreds of elves were busy working, already getting ready for next year’s Christmas, according to Poe.

Every workstation was located around what looked like a pit. It was eight floors filled with elves dressed in differently coloured uniforms, depending on the floor. Each floor oversaw a different activity. The top two floors, where elves dressed completely in white, were in charge of wrapping and labelling. The one underneath was fairly new, it only produced the latest technology in electronic devices, the elves there were dressed in grey.

The fifth floor, all dressed in a reindeer brown, made all the wheeled toys; from skateboards to bicycles, even some motorized things too. The fourth floor had their hands full with sports gear. They wore a very Christmassy shade of green, at the left side they had a small area to test their products. Ben assumed it was only for their own amusement, although they swore it was for scientific purposes.

Third floor produced board games, for all ages. Their blue uniforms easy to see with great detail, as the elves were all sitting in neatly lined tables, working on their different products.

The second floor was all padded, it would seem they were babyproofing the whole area. It all made sense when Ben was informed that is where all toddler and baby toys were made.

All the elves greeted them respectfully, the jingle bells on their hats ringing with the motion. All their uniforms, no matter the colour, had golden accents here and there. The coat was held close by golden buttons and a black belt with a golden buckle. They all wore puffy shorts and white tights, with pointy shoes the same colour of their uniform, with more jingle bells at the tip.

During the whole tour Amy walked silently beside Ben, holding his hand tightly. Her eyes were wide open all the time, and she barely blinked. Her mouth agape and her breathing slow, her face showed her wonder, and her happiness as well. It filled Ben’s heart with warmth to see his niece so content.

When they reached the first floor, it looked empty. Just one large, round space, its walls lined with thousands of drawers. Each one with a golden handle and a little tag tight in the middle.

“This is the hall of letters” Poe said with pride “Here we sort all letters and send them to your office”

He looked at Ben with a huge grin. Ben frowned a little and made a sign with his hand for the elf to continue the tour. He did not want to disrupt anything for his niece, even if it was only a dream.

Poe took them to a spacious office, exquisitely decorated with golden ornaments and some red and green accents here and there. The wooden table in the middle, had images of Christmas carved on its sides and had a large, very thick, leatherbound book placed at its centre. Golden letters shone on its aged pages; a calligraphy set by its side. Rows of names adorned the book, a couple of them crossed with a thin black line.

“Are those the ones in the naughty list?” Ben asked curious, he always assumed everyone got gifts.

Poe nodded with a frown.

“Can I look for my name?” Amy asked.

“I’m sorry little one, that book can only be used by Santa” Poe explained.

Ben expected his niece to argue, but amazingly the little girl accepted the restriction without complaining and started looking around at the rest of the office.

“Uncle Ben can we stay here forever?” Amy asked merrily, while following a scale train that went around the office.

“I don’t know sweetie; I think your mum might miss you too much. Don’t you think?” He said, running his hands through his hair and placing his hands inside the pockets of his perfectly tailored Santa suit.

Amy stopped in her tracks and looked at Ben, she looked like she was debating with herself. Ben knew the little girl loved her mum, but he also knew that she didn’t get to spend much time with her. So, he understood if the girl preferred to stay in a place filled with magic.

_Except, this is a god damn dream._ He admonished himself.

“Well, time to go to bed. Santa, we’re going to need the suit, have to clean it and all that” Poe said with a smile. “Rose will show you to your quarters.”

“Right this way” a girl said from behind them. She had black hair tied in a ponytail and a fringe that just barely reached her eyebrows, her pointy ears grazed the sides of her grey hat.

They followed the little elf. Amy started chatting with her immediately, Ben was trailing behind them, too immersed in his own thoughts to pay attention to what they were saying.

He was wondering if maybe he was losing his mind.

When they arrived at the room Ben had to laugh.

It was something that fit more a castle than someplace in the middle of nowhere at the north pole. Red velvet covered the walls, with wooden pillars dividing them into halves. An ornamental sconce with a long candle was placed high in the middle of every panel.

A king-sized four poster bed was placed on a platform at the far end of the room. With at least a dozen pillows and the fluffiest duvet Ben had ever seen, the bed looked like heaven to his exhausted eyes.

“Here are your pyjamas Santa” Rose said.

Ben rolled his eyes and took the bundle of satin fabric that Rose offered. He was starting to think his subconscious was punishing him for being so intense during Christmas season.

“Please put the suit in the laundry chute and we will clean it and store it for next Christmas” Rose added with a smile.

When he looked around Amy was already curled in the blankets, surrounded by pillows, sound asleep.

He changed into the red pyjamas he had been given and followed Rose’s instructions about the suit.

The moment his head hit the pillow he fell asleep.

++++++++++

Ben opened his eyes and was greeted by the wonderfully blank ceiling from his sister’s guest bedroom.

He smiled as soon as he recognized the room, stretching in his bed, relieved the nightmare was over. Because he decided to categorize what his subconscious decided to show him the night before as a nightmare.

Him being Santa.

Ridiculous.

He slowly made his way to the bathroom at the end of the aisle. He heard the giggles of his niece downstairs. She must have found her presents already. God knows how long she has been awake.

When he stared at himself in the mirror, he let out a very unbecoming high-pitched scream that was accompanied by another a bit deeper but equally shocked one.

He was wearing red satin pyjamas.

And not any pyjamas.

He was wearing _the_ red satin pyjamas. The same ones he had been given in his dream.

The tiny patter of feet running upstairs let him know his niece had heard his burst. He was still staring at himself in the mirror when Amy burst into the room.

“Are you ok uncle Ben?” she asked a little worried.

“I─” he mumbled, unable to continue, he was interrupted by the key that turned downstairs, opening the front door. The little girl ran back downstairs to greet her mother.

“Mummy!!” she yelled in excitement and jumped into Kay’s arms.

Ben walked downstairs and he was able t listen to his niece relate his dream to her mum. Everything he dreamed last night was told in great detail by the little girl.

Or he thought he had dreamed. He wasn’t so sure now.

“Nice pyjamas Ben, really… festive” Kay’s expression was far from amused. Her daughters rambling about the north pole and Ben being the next Santa clearly had not been of her liking.

“Rose gave them to him” Amy answered before Ben could say anything.

“Who’s Rose?” Kay asked with a raised eyebrow.

“I─” Ben managed to say before his niece interrupted him again.

“An elf! From the north pole, she was very pretty” Amy said, and then she ran to her toys under the tree.

“An elf?” Kay said crossing her arms in front of her chest. This was her confrontation stance and Ben knew he was in for a serious talk now.

“Well─” he tried to explain, but Kay interrupted him by raising her hand, silently asking him to be quiet.

“Look… I appreciate you trying to boost her imagination, but I don’ like that she now believes you are the real Santa! That’s just wrong. What happened?”

“I don’t know”

“Ben… come on, you know you’ve always insisted the whole thing is real. With your tale of having seen him on Christmas eve all those years ago. I just don’t want my daughter to be disappointed”

“Right…”

“Ben this is important! It is a serious matter; she will go to school and tell all her friends that story. And you know what will happen?”

Ben only shook his head, still too shocked to use his words in a coherent manner.

“They’ll make fun of her!” she exclaimed barely containing her fury “Just stop the Christmas tales, please”

“Sure…” Ben said with a nod. Then he turned towards the door, and not even bothering to get his clothes he made to leave.

“Wait… aren’t you spending Christmas with us?” Kay asked, now alarmed, and slightly hurt.

“I’m not feeling really well to be honest…” Ben excused himself, his car keys already in his hand. “I just want to lie down”

Kay’s face fell. Her guilt was creeping onto her face. She loved her brother dearly, and now she was wondering if maybe she had been too harsh on him.

“Look, I didn’t mean you can’t spend Christmas here, we would love to have you─”

“I know” Ben cut in “I just… I’m really not feeling well” He scratched the back of his neck and shuffled his feet uncomfortably. “Happy Christmas sis” he said and offered her a hug.

“Happy Christmas Ben” She answered sadly.

“Uncle Ben why are you leaving” Amy cried, staring at Ben with her wide blue eyes.

“I’m just a little tired kid, sorry”

Ben hoped the excuse would be enough. He was sure that, if Amy asked him to, he would stay.

“Oh… well it was a long night. You need your rest. Happy Christmas” and with a kiss on his cheek the little girl said goodbye and ran inside to resume whatever game she was currently playing.

Ben left the house confused and bewildered, making a mental note to schedule a doctor’s appointment as soon as he got home.

How he would explain his problem he had no idea.

++++++++++

He woke again mid-afternoon. This time in his own bed.

He had stripped off the damned pyjamas and tossed it to a corner. He stretched again and sighed. Unsure what to think about all the recent developments. He wanted to believe it was only a dream, yet the bunch of red fabric staring at him mockingly from the corner suggested otherwise.

He put on his dark blue dressing gown and headed towards his kitchen. His body begging for a cup of coffee.

As he approached the kitchen, he heard voices arguing in the living room. He could hear them pacing around the room, jingle bells tinkling with every step.

_Now you are hallucinating._

“He could certainly use some decorations” one voice said.

“Where is the Christmas tree?” said another one.

“This place makes me sad” someone else stated, this voice sounded slightly familiar to Ben. But he was definitely imagining things, so it was a problem for his doctor to solve.

“I thought he loved Christmas” the last voice said with disappointment.

He finally reached the living room and saw four elves snooping around his home. He wanted to do something, but shock kept him glued to where he was standing. His mouth agape and his eyes peeled, Ben felt instantly nauseous and scared. Fully certain he would end up in a mental institution he dropped into the nearest sit and watched as the four elves kept exploring the confines of what he regarded as his personal space.

“Hey Santa, what’s with your lack of decorations? Did you put them down already?” a dark-skinned elf asked from his right. He was holding his favourite cup which seemed to be filled with what looked like hot chocolate. “I’m Finn by the way” he introduced himself.

“I didn’t─”

“He’s younger than I thought” the other girl said, looking him up and down “I’m Jess by the way” she continued to pace around, examining him meticulously

“You will definitely not miss this place. The north pole is so much better” Rose said looking around, frowning, evidently she didn’t approve of Ben’s living space.

“What─”

“Do you want some hot chocolate?” Finn asked.

Now he noticed the elves were not wearing the uniforms from the workshop. They wore a white shirt with a green vest, closed with golden buttons and a black belt. Red shorts and striped stockings. Their pointy shoes were black and had one jingle bell each at the tip.

The little elves kept talking excitedly, rummaging through his drawers, and making remarks about his lack of decorations.

“Shut up!” Ben yelled exasperated.

The four elves stopped at once and stared at Ben with a little trepidation. They did not want to enrage their boss even more.

“Sorry boss…” Poe said, his hands up in surrender. “We were just making sure you were alright, yesterday we didn’t have enough time to explain what was going on”

“What are you talking about? It was only a dream. You are not real. I’m going insane” Ben said, and he walked past his uninvited guests and into his kitchen. Hell bent on making himself some coffee.

The elves sat around his breakfast table, their feet hanging from the chairs. They were silently watching Ben as he poured some water into the reservoir and filled the filter with ground coffee.

He ignored them, hoping they would disappear. It did not work.

They were still there.

With a freshly brewed hot cup of coffee Ben sat in front of the elves and sighed.

“Can I talk now?” Poe asked a little annoyed.

Ben took a sip from his coffee and assented.

“As you know, when you put on the suit, you agreed to becoming the new Santa Claus. Being the current Santa Claus, you are in charge of the workshop at the North Pole. You must make sure everything is run efficiently.”

“How?” _Great, now you are indulging the delusion._

“Well, you will have to move there of course. But don’t worry. You have one year to set your affairs in order, then you can report for duty. We’ll take care of everything in the meantime”

“Can’t you take care of everything indefinitely?”

Their gasp answered his question before they said anything.

“So that´s a no…” Ben whispered to himself, he was starting to sweat. It was freezing outside, and he was only wearing briefs and his dressing gown and still, he was sweating.

“Oh, one more thing” Poe said. Ben was too overwhelmed to notice how this took the other three elves by surprise.

“You also have one year to find a Mrs. Claus” Poe said with a sympathetic smile, that the other three struggled to match when their faces looked so confused.

“What?” Ben asked alarmed.

“Or a Mr. Claus, we don’t judge” Rose added.

“What?” He asked again.

“Well, the job is quite difficult. You will need someone to help you. Besides, it can get a little lonely up there by yourself” Poe explained calmly.

_But I only killed Santa, not his wife._

“What about the current Mrs. Claus?” Ben asked, wondering why she didn’t take the mantle instead of pulling him into the mess.

“Well… it would be a bit low to make a move on a widow don’t you think?” Poe asked.

“I didn’t─”

“She passed a couple of months ago” Rose interrupted him, solemnly explaining the absence of the previous Mrs. Claus.

The silence that followed was so uncomfortable that even the elves started shifting in their seats. Finally, Poe couldn’t stand it anymore and he jumped out of his seat.

“I am so glad you understood the terms of your contract. You have until thanksgiving to meet the conditions. Then you have to report to the north Pole”

Ben couldn’t utter a word. He just stared at the elves while they disappeared one by one. Leaving him alone in his kitchen.

++++++++++

When they arrived at the North Pole, Rose and Jess laughed all the way to their respective homes. Finn pulled Poe back and gave him an accusatory look. Poe just rolled his eyes and answered the silent question.

“So I told him he has one year to find a wife instead of eight, big deal. Do you really want to have him moping around for eight years because he feels lonely?”

Finn couldn’t disagree with him.


	3. The one with Rey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey enters our story. There's some trouble with the little one, Ben has to come to the rescue.

Going through the holiday season has always been a struggle for Rey Kenobi. Christmas had never been special during her childhood. Not that she could remember much about it anyway.

Growing up in the foster system, she had never truly experienced the joy universally associated with Christmas. For years she wrote her letters and diligently mailed them to the man in the red suit; and every year she woke up on Christmas morning to find no gifts beside her bed.

She thought it was because they never had a Christmas tree to signal Santa that he should stop there. But one year she, along with her friend Armitage, had found some tinsel and made an improvised tree at her window, so Santa could see it. They set their letters and went to bed excited for what the morning would bring. Only to wake up to a forgotten letter and an empty windowsill.

She never wrote another letter again.

Rey was aware it was ridiculous for her to still feel so strongly against Christmas. She tolerated the overly cheerful spirit that seemed to possess every living soul around her during this particular time of year.

This was her first year as the headmaster of Chandrila Elementary Academy; the elite school had taken a huge risk choosing someone so young for the role. At 28 years-old, Rey was by far the youngest headmaster to have ever been chosen.

Her youth, however, did not mean she was incompetent.

Quite the opposite.

It was her excellent grades from university, how quickly she had adapted to how things worked at the school, how easily she commanded her classroom, and her no-bullshit approach to life, that finally convinced the board to give her the position.

Something she was beginning to regret.

She missed teaching. She missed organizing activities with her students, and discussing ideas with them, there was something about how the minds of children function that is just fascinating to her.

And the truth was that being headmaster was more about administrative work than what she loved.

Today was the first day back from holiday. It was always complicated because children were still riding the high of Christmas, making teacher’s jobs a lot harder than usual. Especially in a school such as this, the fights over who’s present were better were quite frequent.

However, the fight that broke at recess that day was something entirely new to her.

Amilyn Ketsis had an argument that ended in a physical confrontation, and it had all started when the little girl made a claim to her classroom that her uncle was the real Santa Claus. Something Nari McVee was quick to dispute. Of course, the argument escalated quickly; the pair of girls pulling each other’s hair and it ended with a fist actually connecting with a face.

Rey never thought seven-year olds could be so violent. When she saw Amy walk into her office, sporting the world’s cutest frown, she wasn’t shocked to see Nari walk in almost immediately after. The pair of dishevelled girls was escorted into her office by their P.E. teacher.

Amy wasn’t crying but it was evident she was holding back her tears. Nari, on the other hand, was bawling, holding her cheek and threatening Amy with “loyehs” and “pishon”.

_Wonder where she heard that before,_ Rey thought, internally rolling her eyes at the memory of the last time Mr. McVee was in her office.

_Don’t go there._

It wasn’t Amy’s first trip to the headmaster’s office courtesy of her difficult relationship with Nari. She had often described the other girl as her archenemy, something Rey had discussed with Amy’s mother.

Although the last time the pair ended up in her office it wasn’t Amy’s mother who showed up, but her uncle. An enormous, broad shouldered, dark-haired, honey-eyed, delicious looking man had stormed into her office looking for his niece.

_DO NOT go there Rey._

She had already called the girls’ parents and was now waiting for them to show up. She wouldn’t admit she was a little disappointed when Kaydell Ketsis answered the phone instead of Amy’s uncle.

_Is UILF a thing?... It should be…_

Rey shook her head and stared at the pair of girls in front of her.

She really did not want to talk to Nari’s parents. They were a pair of entitled, self-centred, extremely annoying human beings. Nevertheless, she had to treat all parents equally.

“Amy… would you mind telling me what happened?” Rey started carefully.

“I─” Amy started, but was immediately interrupted by Nari.

“I’ll tell you what happened. She went crazy and attacked me only because I said her uncle was NOT Santa Claus because Santa does NOT exist” Nari yelled angrily.

Amy’s frown deepened and she mumbled something under her breath that Rey could not hear. Then she looked out the window and ignored everything Nari was saying.

Rey listened patiently to everything Nari said, the little girl explained with great detail what had happened, sometimes contradicting herself, which made Rey wonder how much of what she said was true.

“Amy…?” Rey said gently, kneeling in front of the tearful blond girl “Do you want to tell me what happened?”

Amy shook her head to the sides and hugged herself. A bruise was beginning to appear around her right eye. Now she knew whose fist found its target.

“I’d like to hear your side of the story” Rey added kindly.

“What’s the point? You won’t believe me anyway” she said, and her voice broke for the first time, a single tear rolling down her rosy cheek.

She was about to tell Amy she could trust her when the door of her office burst open and a pair of angry screaming parents entered, throwing threats and insults at Rey who was beginning to have a terrible headache.

Then he walked in.

He calmly kneeled in front of Amy, ignoring whatever the McVee’s were saying to him, little Amy immediately threw her arms around his neck and he lifted her from her seat. Holding her close.

“I want that little savage expelled” Mr. McVee spat while pointing at Amy. “Look at the state of my daughter! This place is supposed to be the top elementary school in the city!”

This time Ben solo just calmly stared at Lucius McVee, while he whispered something into Amy’s ear and stroked her back. Then he looked at her for the first time since he walked into her office and her heart skipped a beat.

At this very inappropriate moment Rey remembered how her temperature began rising when she last saw Ben. How he immediately jumped to defend his niece and his sister from the insults of Mr. McVee.

She didn’t even know his name at that point, and she was already willing to throw herself at him. Who knew him just staring at her would have the same effect?

“Mr. McVee if you could please─”

“This institution is a disgrace! I can’t believe someone as incompetent─”

“Mr. McVee!” Rey said, this time raising her voice and sounding as stern as she could. She did not appreciate being interrupted. “I can assure you we take this incident seriously, and we will take disciplinary measures, but I regret to inform you that according to one of the teachers present both parties were to blame in this altercation.”

_Both parties? Altercation? Who the fuck talks like that Rey?_

Mr. McVee’s face scrunched up in an evident sign of disdain at the implication of Rey’s words “You are not insinuating that my daughter─”

“Threw the first punch? Of course not, how could that be possible having such a great role model at home” Ben said interrupting the man’s angry rant.

“Gentlemen, enough” Rey said calmly but with firm tone that she hoped sounded more commanding than it felt.

Ben sat in the chair that had been previously occupied by his niece, with Amy safe in his arms. Lucius McVee, unaccustomed to receiving orders, stood defiantly with a hand on the door, ready to leave.

Mrs. McVee was sitting with her daughter, throwing daggers with her eyes at Ben and Amy while also trying to console her daughter.

“Oh my god, Lucius! look at her hand!” she yelled indignantly, then she lowered her voice to address her daughter “Sweetie did that girl smash your hand with something?”

Ben scoffed and Amy turned to contribute for the first time to the conversation, her face puffy and her eyes glazed with unshed tears.

“Oh I’m sorry! Did my face injure her fist?!” she screamed enraged. Ben covered his mouth with his hand and Rey could swear he was stifling a laugh.

For the first time the McVee’s got a clear look at Amy’s face. The bruise around her left eye was now dark red and the swelling beginning to become apparent.

“You were saying?” Ben said in such a low tone it gave his voice a dangerous edge, a sound that sent tingles down Rey’s spine and straight to places she was in the wrong place to do anything about.

The realisation that, because the damage Nari had caused was much more evident than what Amy had inflicted, it would be difficult for anyone to believe Nari was the innocent party. McVee’s attitude became somewhat subdued.

After a recount of the facts, with a lot of angry glances from both sides, Rey had no choice but to give both girls a suspension for a week. The punishment was considered excessive by Lucius and his wife, Ben on the other hand, only nodded and kept stroking Amy’s hair.

“Don’t bother, I’m taking my daughter out of this wretched school, I’m sure there are other places where she could get a much better education” he pulled at Mrs McVee’s hand and the three of them left the office, slamming the door on their way out.

“Amy, dear” Rey said gently, waiting for her to turn to see her before continuing with what she needed to say, “Amy, please go get your things, I need to talk to your uncle.

The girl nodded slowly and left her uncle’s embrace. Once she was on the floor she headed to her classroom, leaving Ben and Rey alone.

++++++++++

He had to admit, he felt a slight sense of déjà vu when he was left alone with Rey in her office. However, he was completely aware that this would not play out as it usually did in his dreams. He sat silently waiting for her to say something first. He knew he had not made a good first impression and therefore had tried to stay calm during the argument with the other girl’s parents.

That had not been easy. That guy was infuriating.

Fortunately, he didn’t have to wait for long before she addressed the issue that had brought him that morning to her office.

“Mr. Solo, I apologise for how the issue played out. Sometimes is difficult to get parents to hear whatever problem forced me to call them to my office. I appreciate your composure during the whole affair.”

He half listened to what she said while he lost himself in her beautiful hazel eyes. The shades of green were accentuated by the dim lights inside her office, he wasn’t sure, but he would bet everything he owned on the fact that her eyes took on an even more mesmerizing golden hue when exposed to brighter light.

“Ahm… yeah… about that…” he rubbed the back of his neck nervously “I… I apologise for how I behaved last time I was here” he managed to answer.

“I hope you realise how serious this is. It’s the second time the girls get into a fight.”

“Yes, I know. I can assure you she has never reacted violently at home. I have no idea what could have cause this.” Ben had never seen Amy react violently before. Whatever happened must have been bad to make her snap and resort to violence. 

“Well…” Rey said hesitatingly “The girls told me they argued because… Amy said you were the real Santa… and Nari said that was impossible… I’m sure there was more to the conversation, but that was the core of it.”

Ben could feel his face freeze in what must’ve been a very stupid expression. He couldn’t help it. What Rey had said was the last thing he would’ve imagined.

“I mean… that’s just… well…”

“Nonsense, obviously” she said before he would find the right words to describe what it was.

_Well…_

“Right… nonsense” he was beginning to sweat despite the heat being on. He knew it was wrong for her to share such intimate details about their family, especially those that might make others question her sanity.

“I hope you realise it can be detrimental to a child’s development to fool them like that.”

This brought his mind to a halt, his right eyebrow shot up unconsciously, surely she didn’t mean a seven year old should be deprived of the magic of Christmas.

“Woah, woah, woah, woah hang on a second teach, she’s seven. All I did was dress as Santa for Christmas.”

“And now she think’s you are the _real_ Santa Claus, do you see how that might be an issue?”

Her tone made him narrow his eyes, he didn’t want to argue with her. However, he would not agree with her either. It was every seven-year-olds right to have some magic in their lives during Christmas.

He now knew he should have told her to keep their little Christmas adventures between them. They could discuss it later today. Kay was on call and would not be back from hospital until next morning.

He smiled at her before giving a small concession “Alright. I accept I may need to have a chat with her. But there’s nothing wrong with her still believing in the guy.”

“She probably also believes in the tooth-fairy, do you dress as her as well?”

“I’m afraid the suit didn’t look as flattering on me.”

_On you however…_

_Don’t go there Ben._

His imagination immediately put her into a particularly miniscule fairy costume he had once seen displayed outside the local erotica store. One that obviously did not leave much to the imagination. His face went bright red and he looked away trying to rid his mind of those images.

He would never cease to be amazed at how the brain could recall something he didn’t find important before, when it suited his current circumstances.

She cleared her throat and he turned to her again. Aware that he had been looking away for an uncomfortable amount of time.

“Listen, it’s none of my business how things are handled in your home, I just mean it’s a bit confusing to children if they don’t understand the difference between fiction and reality. Since Amy is my student, that makes it my business.”

He stared at her for a moment and didn’t see any hesitation in her. She really meant it when she suggested Amy may be old enough to stop believing.

“She’s seven. I will not tell her Santa does not exist” _Because he does_ “I will talk to her about the whole me being Santa business, but I will not ruin Christmas for her.”

“Christmas would not be ruined, lots of children don’t believe and they have wonderful holidays, look at Nari, she doesn’t believe in Santa anymore.”

“That’s because her parents are dicks.” He argued indignantly, he didn’t like that she chose the McVee’s as an example for him to follow “Great example by the way, the McVee’s”

“How mature.” she chided.

“Who knew you would be such a grinch.” He shot defensibly.

“Who knew you would be such a child.” She retaliated.

At that moment Amy walked into her office with all her things in tow, interrupting what was the most childish argument he’d had in ages. Close behind was her teacher, Jannah. Amy loved her, she always told Ben how amazing everything she taught her was, and how she wanted to be like her when she grew up.

Amy was frowning again, her cheeks a bit ashen from her tears. His heart tightened when he saw her look at Jannah with her big blue puppy eyes that could get most adults do whatever she wanted. A power she thankfully never abused.

“Ready?” he asked his beloved niece, when she assented, he offered to carry her things for her. She gave him her lunchbox and schoolbag, then grabbed his hand. Ben turned to Rey and said goodbye with a nod, then he repeated the gesture to Jannah.

When they walked out of the school, they were both angry. Each about a different thing.

++++++++++

“Are you angry at me?” Amy asked him with a small voice. She was holding a little cold compress the nurse had given her before they left, her beautiful face bearing the signs of her recent brawl.

“What? No. I would never be angry at you” he said in what he hoped was a reassuring tone. He hadn’t realised he had been lost in his thoughts, replaying his conversation with Rey, trying to figure out how it went wrong.

Before walking into her office, he had decided he would somehow find the way to ask her out. Instead, he accused her of being a grinch and she called him a child.

_Great_.

“I’m not angry sweetheart, I was just thinking… Why did you tell your friends that I’m Santa?”

“Because you _are_ Santa.” She answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

He sighed. He was still in denial over his own circumstances, even though all the evidence indicated what happened that night had been real, Ben refused to believe it. He had no idea how he would convince Amy to forget everything that happened while also keeping her Christmas spirit intact.

After thinking it for a moment he settled on a course of action. “Sweetheart… I think we should keep that secret between us.”

“Why?”

“Well… because… ahm… well… people aren’t supposed to know. That’s why Santa only comes when everyone is asleep and all that.” _Even you don’t believe in that excuse Solo._

“I guess…” she mumbled sadly.

“You know what happened is wrong right? You should never recur to violence to settle an argument”

“But she pulled my hair! I don’t like her. She’s mean with everyone. Especially me. That’s why she’s my archenemy.”

“I don’t think it’s a good thing to have an archenemy” Ben quipped, hoping it would do some good with their present argument.

“All superheroes have archenemies.”

He couldn’t argue with that logic. After mulling over what had happened Ben decided that it would be best for Kay to deal with the issue. 

“Well… what do you want to do?” He asked while waiting for a red light to turn green.

“Can we go home?” she asked shyly.

“Of course… are you sure you want to go home already?”

Amy looked down and nodded. “Is mummy coming soon?” she asked with a frown.

Ben hated every time she asked him that question. He knew there was nothing more important to Kay than her daughter. That was she worked so hard, she wanted to give her everything. Except, It seemed to Ben, that in her quest to earn more she was missing time with Amy. And he wasn’t sure it was worth it.

“Sorry sweetie, she has to work. You know how it goes.”

Amy sighed and looked out the window.

“Do we _have_ to tell her about this?”

“She might notice that you are hanging out at home when you are supposed to be at school”

“I doubt it” she mumbled, low enough that he would’ve missed it had he not being giving her all his attention.

“Ames… that’s not fair…” he said, though he wasn’t sure her resentment wasn’t justified.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw her wiping a tear from her swollen eye.

“Sorry” she whispered. “What’s going to happen to me when you go to the North Pole?”

“What?” the question caught him off-guard. _The North pole?_ “Amy what are you talking about? I’m not going anywhere.”

“But you’re Santa” she replied as if it explained everything.

“Amy…”

“But you are! The elves told you, you’ll have to go to the north pole.”

It was impossible to argue with her when she was in that mood. It had been a difficult day for her, and Ben had no idea how to deal.

He parked in front of his building and helped her get her things out. They were silent during the elevator ride, and when they went into his flat. She dropped her bags beside the sofa and went straight to the room he had destined for her. Closing the door behind her.

It broke his heart to see her retreat like that. She would shut everything out, no doubt protecting herself against disappointment. It was something he had noticed himself doing, but she was seven.

He paced around his living room waiting for her to come out. When she didn’t, he decided to do something he knew always lifted her mood. Maybe then she would want to talk to him.

That’s how he found himself knocking on her door holding two spoons, and two tubs of ice cream. One salted caramel brownie and one strawberry cheesecake.


	4. The one where Ben makes a choice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey confronts Ben. Amy asks a favour, Ben agrees. Ben is still in denial about his imminent Santa role.

He was running late. In all fairness it wasn’t his fault. Kaydell had waited until it was twenty past one to ask him if he could pick up Amy. Emergency surgery, the usual.

He hadn’t finished drying himself and he was already putting on his clothes. They could absorb the water that still clung to his skin. The breeze felt cooler on the back of his neck, where his hair was still dripping. Once inside the car, he lowered the top hoping his hair would dry at least a bit. Although it was more likely it would freeze.

As he sped through a couple of red lights, he caught a glimpse of the flash from one of the traffic cameras. He made a mental note to charge Kay for the fine when it arrived. After all, he was still unemployed. That meant no income.

The small revenue from his novels that still made its way to his bank account was almost all immediately gone after paying his bills.

The silencer’s tires screeched to a halt. He was already jumping out of his seat, not even bothering to turn the engine off. He climbed the front stairs two at a time; desperate to reach his niece who by now had been waiting for almost an hour. 

He busted into Amy’s classroom, his heart lurching when he found it empty. A deep feeling of dread was beginning to invade him when a familiar voice called from the other side of the hallway. Near the headmaster’s office.

“Uncle Ben?”

He turned to see his niece, clothes rumpled, hair messy, evidence of the day she had spend among her peers.

“Amy?” he said in a voice unlike his, letting out a breath he hadn’t realised he was holding.

He saw her open the headmaster’s office and say something to whoever was behind the door. She stared at him. Her disappointment was evident on her face.

“Miss Rey wants to speak to you” she said.

“Me? Why?” His confusion overpowered by his excitement; but this was short lived, Amy shrugged and walked away, alarming Ben. It was unlike her to be so dismissive.

“Where are you going?” he asked. Still slightly breathless from his hurry to get to the school.

“I’ll go get my things.” She answered without turning back.

Ben sighed and turned to enter Rey’s office. Amy was obviously expecting Kay; and though he knew she loved him, he also knew she missed spending time with her mum. He loved his niece to the moon and back; but he knew he was a poor substitute for Kaydell. He couldn't wait for her to get her board certification. She had vowed she would look for a job that would allow her to spend more time with Amy.

And he was certain she would do so.

No matter how much she loved her job (because she loved her job, even though she often denied it. A masochist fixation if you asked Ben), her love for her daughter was much greater.

He knocked twice on the door, opening it without waiting for an answer.

“Good afternoon Miss Kenobi. Amy said you wanted to speak to me?”

She looked at him at him with a furrowed brow and pressed lips. He wondered if she had stayed late only to wait for Amy to be picked up. He was sure she had.

An icy “Hello” was all he got as greeting.

She walked to her chair and gestured him to sit. Suddenly feeling like a student again, he obeyed without hesitation. Once they were both sitting on opposite sides of her mahogany desk, she cleared her throat and began to speak, her voice betraying the rage behind it.

“I’m sure you are aware, Mr. Solo, that school ends at one” she said, her voice filled with reproach.

“I know. I apologise for taking so much of your time.” He said, his feeble attempt at an apology instantly slapped down by the angry teacher.

“It’s not my time that I’m upset about. It’s the fact that you could be so… careless and leave Amy waiting for an hour. Did you forget? I’m sure whatever you were doing couldn’t possibly be more important than your niece.”

Ben took a deep breath; he wasn’t sure if he felt offended at her outburst or touched by how much she cared about Amy.

“It wasn’t.”

She frowned and what she did next Ben would have never seen coming. She slapped her hands on her desk and stood, asking with an enraged voice “Then why are you late?”

The outburst made him make up his mind. He was offended.

He mirrored her movements from before and stood, now angry at being blamed of something out of his control.

“Well, _Miss. Kenobi_. For your information, my sister was supposed to pick-up Amy today. Unfortunately, something came up in hospital and she was unable to.” He leaned closer, unaware of how close they were by now. “She only called to ask me to pick her up until quarter past three. I was in the shower! I don’t think it would’ve been appropriate to show up in nothing but a towel. And since I can’t teleport, I’m sure you understand why it took some time to get here. That is why I was late. _Miss Kenobi._ ”

“I…”

Suddenly aware of how close they were, he didn’t move, perplexed at being able to see with perfect clarity the delicate freckles sprinkled across her nose. It took seconds for his eyes to drift to her lips.

And that’s when he saw it.

Reflected on the glass of the window behind her. Rey’s screensaver. A picture of her, laughing, while she was riding on a red-haired man’s back.

He jumped back, bumping into the chair he was sitting on seconds ago. The door opened before he could register the disappointment on Rey’s face.

“There you are little one. Time to get home. Say thanks to Miss Rey.” He said in a hurry, avoiding Rey’s gaze.

Amy barely got a word out before Ben grabbed her things and hurried her towards the door. They dashed to the silencer, her complaints over the suddenness of their escape completely ignored by Ben.

He wanted to get out of the place as soon as possible.

++++++++++

It took her a second to recover from what happened. Unfortunately, by the time she tried to do something, they were gone. From her office window, she saw the black car disappear around the corner. Disappointed at the turn of events, she tried to convince herself that she didn’t care if the man had rejected her.

She was lying of course. It had hurt, and a lot. She had been so certain that he wanted to kiss her she had almost taken the first step. Instants before he jumped away from her like she had some deadly disease.

She turned to her desk and, when Armie’s face smiled at her from her computer screen, something clicked inside her brain.

“Shit.”

Before getting her hopes up, Rey had to be sure. She walked around her desk and she leaned over it; the way Ben had done moments ago. When he had been so close she had been able to smell his warm, smoky perfume.

_Focus._

There it was. Reflected on the glass, the picture Armie had taken of them on her last birthday. They had gone to a carnival and when her shoes gave her blisters, Armitage had offered to carry her back to the car.

She sank on her chair and groaned. She wanted to believe that was the reason Ben had bolted. He saw the picture and assumed she had a boyfriend, but she couldn’t dismiss the possibility that maybe he just wasn’t interested.

“God damn it Armitage.”

She sighed, turned off her computer, and went home.

++++++++++

In true Benjamin Solo fashion, he’d been replaying every single interaction he’d had with her for over an hour. Not that they’d had many.

In that time, he had managed to convince himself that every time he thought she had been interested in him he was imagining it and, in reality, she was only being polite. Except, that look in her eye the first time they met was seared in his brain and he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was missing something.

Amy’s movie was almost finished. It was about the hundredth time she had watched “One hundred and one dalmatians”; she refused to watch anything else. He rolled his eyes when he heard Roger begin singing about the dalmatian plantation; he’d once loved the movie, but overexposure had changed his view.

“Uncle Ben!” Amy called. “The movie’s finished!”

Ben left his hiding place in one corner of the kitchen and went into the living room, where his niece was waiting for him.

“Uncle Ben…?”

“Yes dear?” he answered, sitting beside her and taking control of the remote. Her homework could wait until the latest episode of Bake off was finished.

“Can I ask you something?” she asked, her hands twisting the hem of her shirt.

“Anything dear”

“Is just that… I mean… I need a favour.” Her hesitation made him turn to her, curious to know why she was so sheepish about it. “Thing is… you know… next week there’s this thing at school…”

“Yes?” he said, turning the screen off and giving her his entire attention, hoping it would show her there was nothing to fear. She could ask her anything. Bake off could wait.

“Well, its sports day… and mummy said she would go but…” she stopped, thinking carefully about her next words.

“I’m sure she’ll be there Ames.” He replied after she’d been silent a moment too long.

“I know, she never misses it” she beamed when she said it, but her smile didn’t last long, she looked down with a sad expression. “It’s just… all the other kids… their parents always come…”

He didn’t need to hear the rest of her explanation, he understood immediately what she was asking of him, and he would be damned if he would miss the event knowing how important it was for her.

“Of course, I’ll be there little one.”

++++++++++

Rey hated sports day.

It was one of those activities she was sure she would enjoy is she wasn’t the god damned headmaster, or a teacher. It wasn’t the kids who got on her nerves though. The problem were the parents. Overcompetitive, sore losers, cheaters, the school had it all.

Last year, when she had been just another teacher, it had been exhausting. She had been watching over the wheelbarrow race, and she could have sworn she saw one of the mums trip the boy that was running next to her. The woman denied it, the boy’s father was enraged. It turned ugly. However, Rey didn’t have to deal with it, she just referred them to the headmaster.

This year, she was headmaster. She didn’t even want to imagine the day that she would have.

Covering her face with her duvet, she wished she could stay in and forget about the whole deal. She cursed and got out of bed, annoyed at herself for wanting the damned job in the first place.

One shower and a hearty breakfast later, Rey was on her way to the school. Some last details had to be adjusted, and she needed to see the rest of the teachers before the parents arrived. Everyone hated the event but, because it had been taking place since the school was founded, they couldn’t skip it. No matter how much they wanted to.

Since the event started at 10 a.m. the first parents began arriving about fifteen minutes before. She stood at the entrance, greeting the parents as they arrived.

She was shaking hands with the mother of a sixth-year student when she saw them. Amy Ketsis’s family. Kaydel was holding a bag that probably contained more first-aid stuff than food. Walking next to her, and sporting a roughish grin that made him unbearably attractive to her, was Kay’s brother Ben Solo. On his shoulders was a beaming Amy, eating a banana and singing at the top of her lungs.

Rey had noticed how difficult the day had been for Amy the year before, she had caught the girl more than once staring at the families of her classmates. All of them had both mum and dad with them.

“Good morning Dr. Ketsis” Rey greeted them with a smile, offering her hand to Kaydel.

“Good morning headmaster Kenobi” Kaydel answered, returning her smile and shaking her hand.

“Mr. Solo” she said next, turning to Ben struggling to focus on his face and not let her eyes roam to the man’s impressive chest, straining against the black sports shirt he was wearing.

He answered with a nod. “Headmaster Kenobi”

“Hello miss Rey!!” Amy waved enthusiastically, her smile impossibly large.

At five to ten she retreated to the field where the games would take place. She addressed the crowd and slowly everyone went to their respective competitions. Rey would be doing rounds, keeping order.

Right.

It took the parents forty-three minutes to have their first shouting match. It came from the sack race area, fourth year students. A pair of over-protective mothers were arguing over whose child’s fault was that they fell halfway through. Fifteen minutes later Rey was free to roam the field again. 

No matter how hard she tried to focus on the students and their parents, Rey found herself ogling Ben Solo embarrassingly often.

She also noticed she wasn’t the only one enjoying the view.

Which did not make her jealous.

Not one bit.

++++++++++

“Ah… so that’s why you decided to wear that ridiculous shirt.” Kaydel said with a mocking tone.

“What?” Ben asked, pretending not to know what she was talking about. If his suspicion was correct, his sister had caught him staring at the young headmaster for the third time in an hour.

He now remembered complaining to her about the very shirt he was wearing that day. He’d bought it without trying it first. Assuming it would fit as it was the size he always wore, only to get home and realise it was too tight for him. Apparently, it was supposed to look like that. He didn’t like it.

This was the first time he had worn it since he bought it. And obviously his sister noticed.

She stared at him with a knowing smile across her face. He rolled his eyes and looked away. Pointedly staring the opposite direction from where he knew Rey was standing.

“She’s been staring at you too you know?” she whispered nonchalantly.

The look on his face must’ve been hilarious because Kay laughed at him for a good five minutes. Amy came back and it was time to continue with the games.

It was not fair that she had worn that shirt that clung to her like as second skin, or those shorts that showed her long shapely, sun kissed legs. Unbearable. He caught more than one of the fathers turning to stare at her when she walked by; clenching his jaw and fisting his hands to handle his jealousy.

When it was time for the half-day break, Ben sat underneath a tree while Kay took Amy to the restroom. He was enjoying the cool breeze when a woman suddenly sat by his side.

“Is she your daughter?” she asked pointing towards Amy and Kay.

“Niece” he replied dryly. He didn’t like gossips.

“Oh, how lovely!” she exclaimed, as she moved closer and placed her hand on his arm.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Rey staring at him, and he was surprised to see she looked hurt. She turned away and walked in the opposite direction, disappearing behind a line of trees. He could not be right about that, she was probably looking at something else, or she was remembering something. It could not have anything to do with him. She would never notice someone like him.

He was so lost in his thoughts he hadn’t noticed the woman had scooted closer to him and was still talking. He had no idea what she had said so far and didn’t have any intention to figure out.

“I’m sorry I didn’t catch your name” he said flatly, hoping she would get the hint.

She didn’t.

“Oh, I’m sorry, sometimes I speak too fast. I’m Bazine” her voice barely above a whisper, in a tone he was sure _she_ thought was seductive.

“Right. I’m sorry Bazine, but I need to find my sister.”

Ben stood and trotted, not in the direction of the restrooms, where he knew Kay and Amy where, but towards the place where Rey had disappeared into.

++++++++++

Rey was pacing down between the trees of a small, wooded area partially hidden by the hedge that lined the field. She was holding something in her right hand and seemed to be debating with herself. Ben wondered if it was wise to interrupt her, yet before he could turn around and leave, Rey caught sight of him, and he froze.

She had her hands in fists by her sides and for a second he thought she might attack him, then her expression softened and turned into one of confusion.

“Hi” Ben said. Wincing a little at how idiotic his greeting sounded.

“Hi” she answered.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt you” Ben apologised, but he didn’t move, he stood there staring at her. “I just… wanted to know if you were alright.” 

“Why wouldn’t I be, Mr. Solo?” she asked defiantly.

He winced at the formal address and answered. “You ran away.” Only then did he realise he made a mistake; it was possible she hadn’t even noticed Ben talking to that woman and she only wanted to be alone. Which she couldn’t do with Ben there.

“Did not!” she retorted defensibly.

“Did too”

The childish nature of their argument didn’t go unnoticed by the pair, both of them blushing at how ridiculous it sounded.

Rey looked away and bit her lower lip to repress a smile. Ben marvelled at the sight and almost groaned when he thought of himself biting that lip instead.

“I… wanted to ask you something but didn’t want to interrupt your… conversation.” Rey said, interrupting Ben’s daydream.

“What conversation?” he asked feigning innocence. He knew very well what she was talking about, that Bazine woman had been talking for some time; not that he could remember a thing she said. His attention was somewhere else.

He remembered the picture she had as a screensaver on her computer, in that moment he decided he didn’t care. He liked flirting with her (if you could call what they did flirting) and he would continue to do so as long as she allowed it.

“I… well” she stammered, staring at the place beyond the hedge where Ben had been sitting with Bazine. “I mean it’s not forbidden for the parents to… mingle.”

“Mingle?” he asked, trying (and failing) to stifle a laugh.

She swatted his arm playfully. “You know what I mean.” She said, her own laugh getting the best of her.

“I honestly don’t, please explain.” His hands up in mock surrender, he stared into her golden green eyes and all he wanted was to lean in and kiss her. Too bad she already had someone. Not that he would if she didn’t, he was too much of a coward to be honest.

She narrowed her eyes and considered him for a second. “Very funny.”

He lowered his hands and stopped smiling, he could feel his heartbeat speeding up, and somehow the temperature seemed to be rising.

“Go out with me” she blurted out. Unable to keep the thought inside her head any longer.

“What?” was his stupid response. He was too shocked to fully understand her question.

“I… I mean… I’m sorry I didn’t mean…”

He had obviously fucked up and now she was backtracking. That wouldn’t do.

“Yes” he said. When the memory of the smiling read head appeared in his brain, he shook his head and blurted “I mean no.”

“Oh” the smile that had adorned her face a second ago suddenly fell and he felt a glimmer of hope inside his soul. He had to know. 

“I mean… what about your boyfriend?” he asked. He really wanted to be wrong about the man with the pale face and annoying orange hair.

“I don’t have a boyfriend.” was her answer. There was no indication that she could be lying. Ben had been fooled before but somehow, for some strange reason, he felt he could trust her. His brain disagreed obviously.

“But… but the guy from─”

“My screensaver?” Rey interrupted, she gave him a nervous laugh and waved her hand dismissively “Armitage is my friend, my best friend really. He put the picture as a joke, and I forgot to remove it. Not that I don’t like the picture, I mean we really are good friends, we know each other from home. Just friends though. Well, he’s more like a brother to me. Not that we are actually related but─”

He interrupted her ramblings with a kiss. Fully aware he was crossing a line he retreated and began apologizing. Only to have Rey pull him in and deepen the kiss.

“Uncle Ben?!” Amy called from the other side of the hedge.

“Shit” he whispered, eliciting a giggle from Rey. The most delicious sound he had ever heard.

“Oh, thank _god_ , it was beginning to get embarrassing.” Amy commented, suddenly standing beside them, she began to brush her knees. It was only until he looked down that he realised why she was dusting herself. She had crawled underneath the hedge. 

“Embarrassing?” Rey asked, blushing all the way to the tips of her ears.

“Well, you obviously like each other” Amy stated casually.

“I… what?” Ben said, chocking on air, feeling his face heating from embarrassment.

“Uncle Ben the egg race is about to start, and we _have_ to win” she said, pulling at his sleeve. Then she turned to address Rey “Miss Rey, Miss Jannah is looking for you.”

“Amy I─” Rey began apologetically, still unable to conjure a full sentence.

“He’s free tomorrow.” Amy interrupted with a playful smile and a malicious glint in her eye that Ben had seen before on Kaydell. A thought seemed to suddenly cross her mid and she added “Well, he’s free everyda─”

Ben covered her mouth and threw her over his shoulder. “Time to go.”

The girl giggled, and complained, but didn’t fight back. Ben turned to Rey, wanting more than anything to continue their previous activities but unable to.

“Seven?” before he could utter a word Rey interrupted with a smile that, it seemed to Ben, could light up the darkest of nights.

“Seven”

There was a lightness in his step as he walked towards the spoon and egg competition. Something he hadn’t felt before, he was excited. He was happy.

He had a date.

++++++++++

He walked into his house, his heart bursting with joy at the prospect of going on a date with Rey.

“Benny, my man, how’re you doin’?” Poe’s voice asked from the kitchen.

Ben dropped his keys and phone, missing the bowl at the table beside the front door. His mouth agape, his whole body frozen in shock.

Sitting at the kitchen countertop was Poe, smiling broadly at Ben and waiting for an answer. Knowing well none would come from the surprised human in front of him.

“Congratulations on that egg race. Not sure that’s a useful skill though” he jumped from the table and walked towards the still immobile Ben. “Aren’t you gonna say hello? Such rude manners, we’ll have to work on that. Santa cannot be rude.”

Poe sat on the armchair and stared at Ben, his smile never faltering. It was obvious he found Ben’s shock amusing.

“What are you doing here?” Ben asked after a while.

“What do you think? I’m here to check on your progress.” The elf made a gesture with his hand, indicating Ben should sit. He did so without question. “Do we have any prospects for a Mrs. Claus?” he asked, waggling his eyebrows to show he knew about the date he had.

How he knew Ben had no idea. It felt like an incredible invasion of his privacy.

“Have you been following me?” Ben asked indignant.

Poe’s shocked face was enough for Ben to regain his wits. This time the elf sank in his chair while Ben glared at him.

“I’ve already made a date with my doctor. I’m hoping whatever brain tumour is causing you will be removed.”

Poe frowned, he stood from his spot, not really making any difference to his height. “I’m not the result of a─”

“Whatever, just… leave me alone” Ben said, pinching his nose, all his previous joy from his upcoming date almost obliterated by the annoyance in his living room.

“Ben… if you are serious about not being Santa…” Poe said with hesitation.

This called Ben’s attention and he leaned forward, to listen closely to what he had to say.

“Yes?” he said, encouraging him to finish his thought.

“Well, if you truly don’t want to be Santa. We’d be left with no one to fill the post. Christmas would have to be cancelled and… but If you want… I guess it can be done.”

Ben sat back, looked up and closed his eyes. He didn’t want to believe it, he refused. And yet, somewhere deep inside his soul he knew it to be true. He would become Santa; he could never let Christmas die. Even if it meant he had to go live in the North Pole.

The North Pole.

If things went well… would Rey ever agree to live there?

When he looked down to tell Poe his decision, the elf was gone.


	5. The one with the first date.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The two lovebirds finally get their first date.

He’s checked the time for the third time in the last five minutes. Wishing the clock hands would go faster, Ben stood from the armchair and paced along his living room. He had gone over his plan for the evening at least a hundred times; he could not shake the feeling something might go wrong.

When the doorbell rang, he automatically went over his plan again, anxiously wondering if maybe he misunderstood; maybe they had agreed on meeting at his place instead of his original idea of picking her up.

A second ring pulled him from his reverie, and he sprang towards the door.

He was shocked to find a pair of elves staring up at him from his threshold. Ben ushered them inside, looking around to see if someone might have seen them.

“Well, this place doesn’t look as sad when it’s not Christmas” Rose said while she took in the room.

Ben looked at his watch, hoping the elves wouldn’t stay long. It was 6:23 p.m; he had to leave in ten minutes if he wanted to be at Rey’s door by seven.

“We didn’t think you’d like it if we just appeared in the middle of your living room.” Finn explained with an apologetic smile.

“Not that we care if you like it or not” Rose quipped; her tone laced with a bit of anger.

Ben was surprised, being the spirit of Christmas incarnate, he didn’t think these people were capable of such a negative emotion.

“You really pulled a number on Poe the other day. Hope you’re happy.” Her hands on her hips, her lips a straight line, and her eyes now burning with rage, it was truly unbelievable how such a small creature could be so scary.

Finn was looking everywhere but at him, evidently uncomfortable with the whole situation.

“He thinks Christmas is over for real. Apparently you told him you didn’t care if any children around the world got presents” she said with disdain.

Ben opened his mouth to defend himself but didn’t. He couldn’t remember saying exactly those words, yet he wasn’t sure he didn’t. 

“We’re just here to see if it was true that you won’t… you know.” Finn’s expression contrasted sharply with Rose. The sadness that filled the young elf’s face made Ben gulp, a wave of guilt enveloping him completely.

“We just want to know if we are going to have to find a different employment. Since no elf has been unemployed for the last thousand years, that might take some time.” 

“I don’t remember saying I wouldn’t be… you know.” Unable to utter the name of the man in the red suit, he just waved to illustrate his point. “I just… I need time to adjust to the idea.” Ben looked at the clock on the wall, it was 6:32 p.m. He really had to get going.

“Look…” he started, steering them towards the door. “Just tell Poe not to worry, we’ll talk later. I have somewhere to be.”

“Right, your date” Finn stated casually “I hope she’s Mrs. Clause material.”

Ben was about to give them an earful when they disappeared.

These elves needed to learn some boundaries.

++++++++++

When she opened her door, he found himself suddenly unable to breathe. All his Christmas related problems vanished from his head, his senses zeroing in on Rey.

She was without a doubt the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

That pair of bright hazel eyes that haunted his dreams, even before he’d had a real conversation with her, seemed to pierce into him. Able to see into the deepest confines of his soul. Her long chestnut-brown hair fell in soft waves over her shoulders. It was her giggle that brought him back to reality.

“Hello Ben” she said softly.

He must’ve been staring at her for an awkwardly long time, he could see a tinge of red colour her cheeks. His own face reacting to it, the heat of his embarrassment immediately covering his face.

“Hi Rey” he didn’t recognize the sound that had come out of him, he cleared his throat hoping Rey hadn’t noticed, and continued “Are you ready?”

Her smile broadened and she nodded. She took her purse and closed the door behind her. He opened the car door for her and waited until she was safely out of earshot to sigh and roll his eyes at himself. He nervously ran his fingers through his hair, why did she make him feel like a teenager on his first date? He was a grown-ass man; he had to get it together.

“So” he said once he settled behind the wheel of his black silencer. “I was thinking dinner and a movie. Not necessarily in that order. But if you want to do something else, I totally understand.”

She bit her lip in that delicious way of hers while she seemed to consider her options.

“I’m starving” she finally said, “And I _really_ want to watch ‘The Gentlemen’ it looks like it might be a lot of fun.”

“Seriously?” he felt like an idiot for assuming she might want to watch some sappy rom-com, in all seriousness he had been waiting for ‘The Gentlemen’ to come out for ages.

“Unless you want to watch something else…” she said, a touch of worry in her voice.

“No!” he blurted, aware of how weird the outburst might’ve seemed, he explained himself “I… I really want to watch that too.”

The smile she gave him made his stomach flutter and his heart burst with joy.

“Are you for real?” she asked.

Ben had to turn to see what she was talking about. She was holding one of the CD’s he had inside his car.

“I can’t believe you still use CD’s” she said, not unkindly. She pulled it from its case and introduced it in the stereo.

His silencer was an older model, still capable of playing CD’s, Ben had no complaints about it. He still had his collection from his teenage years, and he loved to listen to them.

“This. Is. Brilliant” she said with a smile, and an expectant look on her face that made Ben fear for what she had found in his collection.

She skipped the first song before it started and when he heard the voice of Pierre Bouvier asking if he ever felt like breaking down, he wondered if he could pull over and run until he crossed the state line, or better yet, the border. 

Rey was no longer laughing, her smile somewhat dimmed. She was deep in thought, like some memories had resurfaced with the music. She paused the track and turned to him.

“In my defence, I was fourteen when that song came out. I was… I was a difficult teenager.” Ben said before she could mock him for his music taste.

“I’m not judging you, I loved that song too. I… identified with it” was all she said. Her expression now slightly sombre, she shook her head, flipping through the cases inside his CD box. “You must have something fun to sing to here.”

“Well, I wasn’t all teenage rage all the time” he defended himself.

Rey laughed and kept looking, eventually finding something that made her gasp.

“Definitely not their best work but” she said as she pulled a case from the bunch. It was Queen’s 1978 Jazz. “I mean. Who doesn’t get a mood lift from ‘Don’t stop me now’?” she asked amusedly.

“You know, my phone is connected to the stereo. It might be easier to just listen from there.” Ben offered.

“No way!” she said with a laugh. “I know it takes longer but I haven’t done this in ages” she turned to him and gave him a serious look. “Besides, how else am I going to find out what you listened to when you were a young hormonal teenager?”

Ben gulped, feeling that strange flutter again. He wondered what young hormonal teenage Ben would have thought about Rey.

He definitely would’ve been stupidly, mind-numbingly in love with her the moment he met her.

By the second verse he had joined Rey’s rendition of Queen’s ‘Don’t stop me now’, both of them singing at the top of their lungs. The rest of the journey was spent singing an assortment of songs, chosen by Rey, in similar fashion.

The moment they arrived at the restaurant he had chosen for the night, neither of them wanted to leave the comfortable warmth of the car. They were having so much fun.

And technically the date hadn’t even started.

++++++++++

Rey could not remember the last time she’d had such a good time.

Starting with the car ride to the restaurant Ben had chosen for their date. It took them five minutes to be shamelessly belting out some of her favourite songs, the volume maxed out and their voices straining from the effort.

She had not missed his comment about him being a difficult teenager, she had felt a spark of understanding flare within her when he said it. Yet, she wasn’t ready to share her sad story, for now she was happy just having found a kindred spirit to sing ‘Don’t stop me now’ and ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ with. 

That meant that even before they had set foot on the Italian place, the date was already going extremely well.

They had to wait a little for their table, the place was packed, so they ordered some appetizers to start. Her negroni, though delicious, had been too sweet for her and Ben offered to switch drinks with her. She refused at first, but he insisted. Apparently, the man had quite the sweet tooth. It was the kind of information she knew she had to file for later.

Rey told him she was incredibly happy with his choice of restaurant as Italian was her favourite food; and Ben had shared that even though he loved Italian, he still preferred Mexican food. As he pulled her chair for her to sit her mind raced to think of Mexican restaurants they could visit next.

They spent their meal commenting on their food and talking about their respective jobs.

Ben told her about his book, how he had struggled so much with the legacy from his family, that ultimately the burden tore him apart. He described it as losing his voice.

“I… I don’t know. Everything just sounds as excuses” he said running his hand through his hair. He did that when he was nervous. “But it’s how it felt. Everyone expected so much from me, they wanted the son of Leia Organa, the last of the Skywalker dynasty… they didn’t want… they didn’t want me.” He finished, his voice a little unstable, filled with sadness.

She couldn’t help herself. She wanted to touch him, so she did. She placed her hand over his and the look of hope in his eyes stole the breath from her lungs.

She’d had a difficult childhood, abandoned by her parents, with no one to love her. Armitage had been there, but they were both in the same circumstances. They were both unwanted children. She didn’t have a family; she didn’t belong to anyone. No one ever tried to control her, she never doubted who she was or where she was going. There were no expectations, everything had always been her choice.

Ben didn’t have that. Yes, he had a family, and yes he had never been alone really, but no one saw him for who he was, everyone expected him to be some ideal next link in a line of writers. That meant that, just like her, Ben never felt like he belonged.

He felt alone.

She felt alone.

Maybe, just maybe, they wouldn’t have to be alone anymore. The thought both thrilled and terrified her.

They ended up sharing their respective desserts, eating half panna cotta and half tiramisu, their meal finished on a high note.

After dinner they went for a little walk on a nearby park, enjoying the cool evening breeze.

“I was wondering” he said, as they passed by the empty swings “Do you still want to go see the movie? It’s not too late now, but it will be when the movie ends.”

It was quarter to nine. The movie was about two hours long; they would be out a little before midnight. And they were a good twenty-five minutes away from her apartment.

_Maybe his apartment is nearer._ She quashed the rogue thought before it could evolve into a daydream of what exactly they could do in his apartment, all alone.

No. It was their first date for christ’s sake.

A voice inside her said she didn’t care.

“I really want to watch ‘The gentleman’, I think we’ve waited long enough” was her answer.

If she was talking about watching the movie, or some other late-night activities, she wasn’t sure.

++++++++++

He really enjoyed the movie. Truth be told, there were moments when his attention had been compromised by the feeling of Rey’s hand squeezing his. That only added to his enjoyment of the whole event.

“I almost didn’t recognize Hugh Grant with a cockney accent, he always sounds so posh… it was weird” she said with a laugh, as they left the cinema.

He couldn’t stop staring at her smile, and the soft waves of her hair floating behind her with the night air.

“I feel like I knew what was going to happen and yet… it was unexpected” he commented.

“I know what you mean!” she stated with contagious excitement. “I don’t know what to think. Other than: I liked it.”

“I’m glad” he said turning to her. They were standing by the passenger door of the silencer, neither of them made a move to open the door, they just stood there, getting closer.

He could feel the warmth of her skin on his face, he wanted to close the gap between them but wasn’t sure it would be appropriate. It had been so long since he had been on a date he had probably forgotten how to kiss.

“Ben…” she whispered, and something in her voice gave him the encouragement he needed. He leaned in, caressed her cheek, and finally pressed his lips to hers.

It was gentle, chaste, it was perfect.

It wasn’t enough.

They both wanted more, his left hand gently tilted her head up, her lips parted giving him entrance. Her hands travelled up his chest and eventually found their way to the back of his neck, pulling him closer.

“Get a room!” someone yelled from the other side of the parking lot, and they both jumped away from each other, breaking the spell that had enveloped them moments before.

Not for the first time Ben wanted to beat someone to a pulp.

He had to readjust his pants before entering the silencer so she wouldn’t see anything that could be embarrassing. It was such a teenager reaction; he was still berating himself by the time he parked outside Rey’s door. The drive to her house had been slightly awkward, their conversation never straying from the movie they had just seen.

He wondered if she regretted what had happened.

He walked around the car and opened her door; she had the same funny expression she had when he’d done the same outside the restaurant.

He wanted to walk her to her door but didn’t want to overstep. He didn’t want her to think he assumed anything would happen because of the kiss, walking with her to her door might give the wrong impression. He just stared as she strode away.

She didn’t give three steps before she stopped.

She turned around and stared at him, a questioning look in her eyes. He took a step toward her and she smiled. He followed her to her door.

“Ben, I had a great time tonight” she said. The smile she gave him would forever be seared in his memory as the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

“Me too, it was wonderful… every second of it” he didn’t mean to say the last part out loud. He hoped he had said it low enough she hadn’t heard it. He knew the universe wasn’t so kind to him.

He was still scolding himself for oversharing when he felt her lips collide with his. It took him two seconds to realise what was happening, he circled her waist with his arms and pulled her closer. She was intoxicating, he couldn’t get enough of her.

Reluctantly he parted from her, begging whatever deity ruled the universe she couldn’t notice the evidence of his arousal through his trousers. She was still so close; he could feel her breath on his chin.

“Ben… I…” she bit her lip and it took everything in him to not bite it himself “I know it’s our first date and I don’t… I never… but I want…”

“I feel it too” he whispered. Hoping he wasn’t wrong about the meaning of her words.

She smiled at him and laced her fingers with his. She pulled her keys from her purse and she led him inside her home.

++++++++++

The moment she decided to spend the night with Ben she fully expected to have a couple of drinks first, chat for a while, then they would continue what they had started at the parking lot of the movie theatre.

They barely made it to the living room.

All her brain (or some other part of her) wanted the moment they walked through her door was to have this man in every way possible, that resulted in them being half naked by the time they crashed into her sofa.

Eventually they found their way to her room, and after a couple of rounds of the best sex of her life (seriously the man had stamina), she had drifted off to sleep.

Now she had opened her eyes to the darkness of her room, her bladder ready to burst again, even though it had been relieved just a few hours ago.

She had been asleep for less than four hours when she saw the 6:23 a.m. on her clock at her bedside table and an idea sparkled to life inside her head. She stared Ben’s naked form, he was laying face down, snoring softly on the other side of her bed. A wave of affection surged within her and she worried for a moment it could end in disaster.

She knelt beside Ben, brushing a lock of hair away from his eye.

“Ben” she whispered, her fingers caressing his handsome face, running over the beauty marks that adorned his skin. “Ben” she repeated, this time he answered with a groan.

“Ben, I want to show you something.”

“I think you’re trying to kill me.” he grunted, not reproach but humour behind his words.

Rey giggled and she ran her fingers down his back.

“Beeeen” she sang “I really want to show you something.

He complained but turned around, now facing the ceiling he opened one eye to look at her, his face completely serious he said. “I don’t think I can go another time tonight.” The very real sorrow that laced his words pulled a chuckle from her.

She swatted at his chest with no real malice and laughed. “That’s not why I woke you. I want to go see the sunrise at the beach. Would you come with me?”

He closed his eyes and for a second she feared it had been a horrible idea to wake him. But then he smiled and said “Ok”.

They dressed quickly and left her house with enough time to get to the beach before the sun was up.

She lived about 900 metres from the beach, it shouldn’t take long for them to get there. She took his hand in hers and they walked like that, holding each other, and they didn’t let go even as they sat on the sand, their feet just within reach of the waves.

She stared into Ben’s eyes as the first rays of sun slipped over the horizon, the golden hues in his irises tinkling with mirth.

She was certain she had never witnessed a more beautiful sunrise in her entire life.


	6. The one where they meet the family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey take another step in their still blossoming relationship.

February turned into March and suddenly the air was filled with the smell of blooming flowers and reborn foliage.

One month had passed since their first date, and another three had gone without a hitch. Ben couldn’t be happier with how things are going with Rey, she’s funny, incredibly intelligent, resourceful, kind, and so magnificently beautiful he has wondered several times if maybe he’s going through another hormonal storm like the one all teenagers go through. Maybe they both are. They can’t keep their hands off each other.

Today however, their date will be different. It won’t be only the two of them. Today Ben will meet Armitage Hux. Rey’s best friend. Though she refers to him as her brother, they are not actually related. They have been together since they were children, both abandoned by their birth parents and trying their best to thrive under circumstances that no child should go through.

They decided to meet their respective families this weekend. That meant Saturday dinner with Armitage and Sunday brunch with Han and Leia, probably Amy, and less likely Kay.

Stepping out of his car, it takes his eyes a second to adjust to the fluorescent lights that illuminate the restaurant’s sign at the entrance.

Rey and Armitage are sitting opposite each other at a booth on the far-left corner of the room. The place has a 60s aesthetic that he immediately likes, despite his initial apprehension when he heard the word ‘diner’ after the name of the place.

“Ben!” Rey cried from a distance.

He couldn’t help but smile at the expression that illuminated her face when she spotted him slowly approaching them. He waved and crossed the room as fast as he could.

“Hello sweetheart” he greeted. He leaned in and gave her a chaste kiss on the lips, not wanting to get on her brother’s bad graces just yet.

“Good evening Benjamin” the redhead that shared their table said, extending his hand towards Ben, waiting for him to shake it.

Ben did and gave him what he hoped was his friendliest smile. “Hello, you must be Armitage. Rey has told me a lot about you.”

“I wish I could say the same.” Hux answered. Rey cleared her throat and he backtracked. “Just kidding, she has mentioned you. Lets order something to eat. I’m starving.”

The three of them sat on the booth, Rey and Ben on the same side, Hux on the other.

“I’m so glad you’re here.” Rey whispered, low enough so only he could hear. He smiled and kissed her temple, holding her hand underneath the table.

The way the redheaded man was staring at him made him feel like he was on trial for some crime he was sure he did not commit. The waitress approached them, gliding effortlessly over the black and white tiles on her roller skates.

They gave her their orders, Hux went for a steak and fries, both Rey and Ben decided on a classic burger. Shakes were the common drink among them.

“So” Hux said, placing his menu behind the sauces at the far end of their table and leaning back on his red faux-leather seat. “Benjamin. What do you do for a living?”

Ben felt the question hit him in the middle of his chest. What did he do? He could not say he was currently unemployed, or that that had been his state for the past eight months. Two years if he was being honest.

“I’m… I write” was his feeble answer. And he hoped and prayed to all the gods in the universe that Hux would drop the subject.

He didn’t.

“Published anything lately?” he asked with feigned interest.

Ben could see Rey out of the corner of his eye, shooting daggers with her eyes. Hux ignored her and focused on Ben.

“Not really” he answered honestly, then he decided to share some information no one but him knew. “I recently started working on a sequel for my novel.”

This called for Rey’s attention, who turned with a shocked expression, which transformed into something he could only describe as… pride. She was proud of him.

“Ah, yes. The novel.” Armitage said with a hint of disdain. “You published it a while ago didn’t you?”

Ben held Hux’s gaze and he knew, right then, that the man had done his research. He _was_ here to be judged. So far, he was not doing great.

“I did, yes.”

“I guess it’s never late to write a sequel.” The smile on Armitage’s face was full of condescension.

“What’s your point Hux?” Rey asked, now furious.

“Well, I was just wondering if he’s written anything in the meantime.” He said, his innocent tone not convincing anyone.

“Nope”

The waitress arrived with their food just in time to prevent any further questioning. Only then did Ben notice that his heart was racing, and that he was starting to sweat, even though the temperature inside the diner was pleasant. Rey laced her fingers with his and gave him a gentle squeeze. Her eyes apologising silently for what had just happened.

The meal was spent in almost complete silence, only broken to ask for a condiment or to comment on the quality of the food.

When Rey asked Ben to move so she could go to the restroom his stomach twisted. He did not want to be alone with Hux. He wasn’t afraid of him, but he wasn’t an idiot. He knew that Hux was incredibly important to Rey, and he didn’t want to lose what they had because of his own short temper.

“What are your intentions with Rey?” Hux asked bluntly, once Rey was out of earshot.

Ben started choking on the sip of water he was taking. Hux stared at him with a blank expression while he coughed.

“Excuse me?” he asked with a strained voice. Hoping he was wrong and Hux hadn’t just asked him _that_.

“Your intentions. With Rey.” Hux repeated calmly.

“Well… I─”

“Because if this is just a game to you I’m going to have to ask you to back off before you hurt her” Hux leaned forward, with an expression Ben thought was meant to be intimidating but instead was slightly humorous.

“It’s not─”

“I googled you.” Hux admitted. “Not the most reliable person, are you?”

Ben’s eyes shot to the man’s face. His anger bubbling inside him, threatening to explode.

“What?” he asked, hoping he had managed to keep his fury from showing in his voice.

“I’ve seen a lot of arseholes try over the years. This time… she’s never…” he clears his throat “I don’t want to see her hurt.”

Hux looked out the window, seemingly lost in some memory that the situation had conjured. If it wasn’t for the golden band on his left hand, and the fact that Rey had told him that the man was happily married to a woman named Gwen, his protectiveness towards Rey would’ve made Ben jealous.

He understood that this was a man who truly cared about Rey. She was his little sister.

“It’s not a game to me I…” Ben hesitated; he didn’t want this man to be the first to know what he was about to say. He ran his fingers through his hair and quickly glanced at the restroom doors to check Rey wasn’t coming, then he made the decision to share the truth inside his soul, his most precious secret. “I love her.”

Hux didn’t say anything. His expression didn’t give away whatever he was feeling, he just continued to stare at Ben. So naturally Ben panicked.

“I haven’t told her yet. Because we haven’t been together for that long and I don’t want to scare her…” Ben’s heart was beating so wildly he wondered if maybe Hux could hear it.

“Please… I want it to be special” Ben wasn’t above begging him to keep his mouth shut. He just didn’t want to do it. “Please… please let me do it my own way.”

A smile flashed on Armitage’s face, so quick Ben wasn’t sure it had been there in the first place.

“Your secret is safe with me” he said. His expression softer this time.

A wave of relief washed over him, feeling like a bucket of cold water on a hot summer day. Allowing him to breathe normally for the first time since he had arrived at the diner.

“Scooch” Rey said, bumping his shoulder with her hip. Noticing the relaxed atmosphere that had engulfed their booth she asked: “Did something happen?”

“Nothing” Ben said, an innocent smile on his face.

Rey eyed them warily, taking both of their expressions, and analysing them silently. Seemingly satisfied with her conclusion she continued eating her dessert, forgotten long enough to have melted slightly.

The conversation flowed easily after that; he even shared a couple of laughs with Armitage. Rey seemed so happy at the way things turned out. She didn’t ask him what had happened, and he was glad she didn’t. He knew it was too soon to bare his soul to her and let her know the depth of his emotions.

After they said goodbye to Armitage, Rey turned to him and gave him a kiss unlike any they had shared before. It was slow, gentle yet so sensual he felt exposed. When at last they parted, her eyes seemed to shine in a different manner. Without words he understood the meaning.

It was a look full of promises.

That night, once they were alone in her apartment, Ben was determined to show her, without words, how she made him feel. Everything he was keeping inside his heart.

++++++++++

Spending the night with Ben Solo is nothing short of a religious experience.

She’s never been particularly religious, however every time she has been with Ben she is certain she has seen god himself.

Waking up next to him is close behind in the scale of pure bliss.

The first thing she notices is the warmth of his chest against her cheek. He is by far the most comfortable pillow anyone could ask for. Not that she would ever share. Ever.

She slowly peels herself from his embrace, careful not to wake him. He looks so beautiful when he’s asleep. So calm and peaceful. Rey is afraid of the intensity of her feelings for this man, they terrify her. They’ve only been together for a few weeks, only gone on five dates. It’s ridiculous and nonsensical, and yet… here she is, smiling like an idiot while staring at the man she loves.

It’s still early, they have enough time to enjoy themselves before getting ready for their brunch. She turns back to gaze at Ben’s naked form, relaxed and barely covered by her bedsheets. Some hunger is set alight inside of her, one that she’s not sure will ever be satiated. And she decides to wake him, with soft kisses _everywhere._

++++++++++

After the most glorious morning of his entire existence, Ben is driving down a familiar road with Rey by his side. They had agreed to meet Han and Leia at their house for brunch. Thus completing their quest to meet each other’s families.

Dinner with Hux had gone better than expected; despite the difficult start (and middle) it had ended on a positive note. With Armitage Hux seemingly willing to accept Ben as part of Rey’s life. And part of Rey’s life he intended to stay for as long as she would allow him to.

He opened Rey’s door and offered his hand to help her out. That’s when he noticed she was trembling slightly.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, worried maybe she didn’t want to meet his family jusy yet. It was quite soon after all.

She turned to him, not letting go of his hand. “What if they don’t like me?” she asked, genuinely concerned.

“Impossible. If anything, they might convince you that you deserve better than me.”

His self-deprecating comment served its purpose and made her laugh. She relaxed visibly and they walked hand in hand towards the front door.

The houses on this part of town were all Victorian houses renovated to fit the styles of their affluent owners. Far from the cookie-cutter homes of some of the newer suburbs, the residential area where Han and Leia lived was a part of Chandrila that had been around since the 1800s. The Organa-Solo residence was one of the biggest houses in the suburb, towering over the rest at three floors. With its dark blue high pitched roof slopes, and white details around the windows, the sky-blue house was an imposing sight that always brought warmth to Ben’s soul.

It was his father who opened the door, his eyes going from Ben to Rey and back, the corner of his mouth curling upwards in that mischievous way of his that indicated he was about to make some snarky comment. Thankfully he didn’t.

“Hey kid” Han greeted him, then turned to the woman in his arm “You must be Rey, we’ve heard so much about you.”

“All good things I hope” she answered, a hint of insecurity in her voice Ben had never heard before.

Han chuckled and showed them in. “All good kid don’t worry. Please come in, my wife is starting to get impatient to meet the mystery girl.”

“Dad─”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, well you are the first that we are allowed to meet so you must be pretty special.”

Rey giggled and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. Ben wanted the earth to open up and swallow him hole. He should’ve known something like this would happen. And she hadn’t met his mother yet.

“I’m the first?” Rey asked him in a whisper, and Ben swallowed nervously.

She was the only woman he had ever wanted to introduce to his parents. He had dated before; he’d even had a two-year relationship with a fellow English major at college. He always found a reason not to bring her home to meet his family.

This time was different though. Rey was different.

“Well, you _are_ _very_ special” he whispered back, and he noticed a lovely pink tinge colour her cheeks, the sight making his heart skip a beat.

Han led them through the house towards the back porch. Thankful that Rey’s attention was focused on the garden, which was visible through the glass wall that separated the house from the deck at the back, and not on the multiple pictures Leia had arranged around the available surfaces of the furniture inside. Ben was certain some of those hadn’t been out the last time he had been there.

“Ben, Rey!” Leia called from behind the glass door. “It’s so good to see you.”

Leia moved towards Rey first, pulling her down for a hug and saying something that Ben couldn’t hear.

Han stood by his side and patted his back whispering: “Way out of your league huh?”

“Shut up.” Ben said, a smile on his lips as he fully agreed with his father.

“Not your fault, it’s the Solo way” he said, and both men laughed while staring at Leia and Rey.

“Come in come in, food is getting cold.”

Outside was a round table with four chairs around it, at its centre was a three-tier cake stand brimming with different pastries. Two pitchers of what looked like orange juice, a silver coffeepot, and a crimson teapot were huddled beside the fruit salad.

“Mrs─ Leia, everything looks wonderful.” Rey said in awe.

“Oh, I was so excited you were coming I might’ve gone overboard. Sit please, I’ll be back in a second” she disappeared through the doors that led to the kitchen, Han gestured them to sit.

Everything did look wonderful, leave it to Leia to go above and beyond with what should’ve been a simple gathering. Nothing was ever simple with his mother.

“I hope you like eggs Benedict” Han said with a smile, while he placed his napkin on his lap.

Leia came back moments after, closely followed by Threepio and Artoo, an old couple who had been working with his family since the house was owned by his grandparents, and who oversaw everything related with the house. Including cooking.

Leia was a wonderful mother, one of the kindest human beings he knew and a brilliant writer, but the kitchen foyer was where her skills sadly came to an end.

“I’d go for tea.” Han said when Ben went for the coffee pot. “Your mother made the coffee.”

Ben understood immediately and went for the teapot instead.

“Han!” Leia protested, Artoo chuckled and shared a knowing look with Threepio.

“I’m sure is ok princess, but I happen to know how my son takes his coffee and I’m just saving him the disappointment.”

Leia huffed, with mock exasperation, the smile on her lips giving away her true feelings about her husband’s comment. “Excuse my husband Rey he obviously still has to learn some manners.”

“My apologies your worshipfulness.” Han apologised, a playful glint in his eye as he looked into his wife’s eyes.

Leia began stabbing her previously perfect egg, the rest of them following her example and working on their respective plates. Artoo and Threepio never failed to impress with their food.

“So, Rey” Han said, putting his knife and fork down “I hear you’re the headmaster of Chandrila Elementary. How’s the job treating you?”

Rey sighed and wiped the corner of her mouth before answering “It has its ups and downs.”

Han nodded in understanding. Ben had told them before how vicious some of the parents could be.

“Meeting Captain dark side here being one of the downs I assume.” Han joked.

“Han” Leia warned.

“Actually, I’d count that as one of the ups” she said, holding his hand under the table and giving him the sexiest wink ever. Remembering where they were, Rey cleared her throat and continued eating.

“Is the post everything you expected?” Leia asked. Ben narrowed his eyes at her, he didn’t want this to become an interrogation.

“To be honest, I think I miss being a teacher” Rey said truthfully “Being headmaster is a very administrative job; I really miss the kids” the smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes made Ben want to hold her close and make her forget her worries.

Just not in front of his parents.

“Oh darling, I’m sure it’s a lot of work, but from what I hear, you’re doing an amazing job” Leia said proudly.

“Thank you.” Rey said, this time flashing a genuine smile.

“Still gossiping with the PTA people I see” Ben said.

“It’s not gossip Benjamin; I like to be informed of current events” Leia retorted.

“What about you Mrs…Leia, Ben tells me you’ve been traveling a lot lately!”

“Oh yes, we have been, we needed a change of scenery. It’s done wonders for our marriage.”

Han took his wife’s hand in his and kissed her. Ben hoped one day he could have something like that with someone. Hopefully with Rey.

“Keeping the flame alight is very important.” Han said with a grin, staring at Ben. An obvious attempt to make him uncomfortable. Obviously succeeding.

“Right─” Ben said, eager to change the subject before being interrupted by his mother.

“After a while, you see, things can become a bit… boring. Especially in the─”

“Please mother, I beg you. Do not finish that sentence.” Ben said, his eyes almost bulging out of his sockets trying to make his mother understand how much he did _not_ want to have this conversation.

“Benjamin, nothing to be ashamed of, all couples do it.” Leia said casually.

“Some more often that others.” Han added.

“God please” Ben groaned, his hands now covering his face in embarrassment.

Han and Leia guffawed; the sound so infectious eventually all four of them had their eyes glazed with tears of laughter.

++++++++++

Up on the sycamore that held Ben’s treehouse, resting while enjoying some gingerbread cookies, were Poe, Finn, and Rose. The three elves observing the beautiful scene from a distance.

“I’m still not sure this is appropriate” Finn said nervously, a smile threatening to break loose at the sight of such a lovely scene.

“Nonsense, we have to make sure the boss upholds his side of the bargain.” Poe said dismissively. Holding a pair of binoculars and pointing them at the deck where Ben and his family were having brunch with the lovely teacher.

“Not really a bargain though, is it?” Rose asked, a tinge of sadness in her voice.

“Whose side are you on?” Poe asked annoyed at the implication of Rose’s tone. She had been going on and on about how the new Santa had no choice and that maybe that was not fair. Whatever had gotten into her had to stop. They were on a mission to save Christmas.

“I’m just saying” she explained “This guy has a lot of people in his life, it’s going to be difficult to leave them all behind”

“You are saying it like they won’t see him ever again” Poe quipped, rolling his eyes at the thought of being accused of basically kidnapping some random man to become the new Santa.

Hell, even he was beginning to question their methods. He needed to get a grip. Christmas was more important.

“He will live at the north pole” Finn argued “Not exactly the world’s most reachable place”

“There are ways, anywhere that’s not the biggest issue here.” He said, again looking through his binoculars. This time focusing on the young woman sitting beside Ben.

“No? Then what?” Rose asked, nibbling on a snowman shaped cookie.

“Rey Kenobi” Poe said, as if the sole name should explain his attitude.

“What about her? She seems wonderful.” Taking a sip from their hot chocolate filled thermos, she snatched Poe’s binoculars and stared at Rey.

“She’s a non-believer” Poe said sombrely.

“Oh…” Rose said, her tone denoting her immense disappointment.

“Yeah” he said and took back his binoculars before continuing “And _we_ have to do something about it.”

“Do we even know why she doesn’t believe?” Finn asked, unsure of what exactly were Poe’s intentions with this.

“We will not meddle Poe!” Rose said angrily.

Poe sighed and kept staring at the couple. They sure looked happy, if only there was a way they could do something to make her believe again.


	7. The one where summer turns into autumn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A relationship blossoms. Will Ben have the courage to tell Rey about his new gig?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to up the chapter count to be able to fit the story I want to tell. Sorry :)  
> Love,  
> Is

The smell of hot chocolate and the distant hissing of what could only be a very small steam train effectively vanished whatever dream he’d been having.

His eyes fluttered open and the first thing that caught his attention was the chandelier hanging where his simple lightbulb should be. Then the red velvet from the walls alerted him that he wasn’t at his flat in Chandrila. This was that nightmarish place he’d dreamed about during Christmas.

_Not dreamed about. Been at. This is real._ He needed to remind himself.

He was wearing pyjamas he didn’t remember putting on the night before, and beside his bed was a small tray with a stack of what seemed like freshly baked sugar cookies and a cup of hot chocolate.

He rubbed his eyes hoping this time it _was_ a dream but to no avail. He had been brought to the north pole during the night. Those damned elves would hear him when he saw them.

“Good morning boss” the elf, _Jess_ he remembered, greeted him cheerfully.

“What am I doing here?” he asked, not even trying to hide his annoyance at the breach in his privacy. _What if Rey had been with him?_

“Oh, Poe said you’d agreed to come here for the routine inspection of the list and to check on the progress made for next Christmas” she answered cheerfully. Instead of softening him that only enraged him further.

“Who said what?!”

The elf flinched and he regretted using such a tone with her. However, he had been kidnapped and he wanted to find the culprit. 

“I’m sorry sir” she said with a trembling voice “I… Poe said… I was asked to bring you to the second floor to begin inspection.”

“I want Poe here, now!” he ordered, almost losing whatever trace remained of his patience.

“Yes sir. Right away” she turned on her heels and ran out of the room.

These elves definitely need a lesson on how to respect the privacy of others. Ben walked towards the large desk that was located at one of the corners of the room. There were some papers stacked there, but the most notable item was a large leather-bound book with golden rimmed pages. The book of names. The one with the names of naughty and nice children all around the globe.

He was about to open the book when a toy steam train (if a steam train can be a toy, maybe its just a miniature very real steam train) stopped in front of his desk, an envelope perched inside one of the wagons.

The letter inside was written in golden ink and was an invitation to join the elves in a game of football outside the factory at 4pm that afternoon. Suffice to say Ben was not eager to do anything the elves wanted him to. He had a date today with Rey and the longer he stayed here his odds of disappointing her increased exponentially. 

They were supposed to go to the amusement park, just the two of them. And spend the whole day with adrenaline pumping through their veins and hopefully, a whole night too, only derived of entirely different activities.

The door to his quarters opened and a visibly ashamed Poe walked in. His face scrunched up as if waiting for the scolding Ben was sure to give.

“You called for me Santa?” he asked in a low voice.

“First of all, it’s Ben, as I’ve told you before. And second of it what the _fuck_ am I doing here Poe?! You can’t just break into my house and drag me here without my consent!”

The elf winced visibly at the expletive “I didn’t think you’d agree to─”

“Which is exactly my point! I wouldn’t have because I’m supposed to be somewhere else today!”

Poe mumbled something Ben couldn’t hear and that only increased his anger.

“Speak up! I agreed to have my life ruined by your damned games, the least I expect from you is some honesty” Ben regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth. He didn’t feel his life was being ruined by the new developments, not yet anyway. Truth be told, he hadn’t given much thought as to what this new role would mean for him.

But the elves did cross a line.

“Sorry sir.” Poe apologised.

Ben ran a hand through his hair and sighed. Pacing in front of Poe, trying to find the right words to confront the situation he found himself in. He was talking to a god damned elf, one of Santa’s helpers. _His_ helpers.

“I need to go home” he said, his head beginning to throb, he needed to be with Rey. This whole mess could wait. “We can do this tomorrow… or next week.” _Or never,_ his traitorous thoughts added.

“That’s fine sir. I just…” Poe was still weary of Ben’s movements.

“What?!” Ben yelled, making the head elf jump backwards and bump against the desk, making some of the papers flop to the floor.

“The elves… they are eager to meet you sir. They want to get to know you before…” Poe seemed genuinely sorry for how he’d handled the situation, and Ben was now out of anger and fully into guilt territory.

He groaned and slumped over the bed. “I’m sorry” he mumbled. Taking a deep breath before standing again and facing the elf that had become the main annoyance in his life.

“Look Poe, I have something really nice going on with someone I really care about─”

“Rey” he said rolling his eyes.

This made Ben stop. If he had been spying on him, it was only natural to assume he had seen Rey as well. He had to know though.

“Have you been spying on her?” he asked, careful not to let his rage seep through.

“No sir” Poe answered, too quickly for Ben’s liking, too… rehearsed.

“Poe listen to me” This time he grabbed the elf by the shoulders, as gently as his anger allowed him, still making him freeze. “This is my first order to you as… your boss. I am _ordering_ you to stay away from Rey do you understand?”

Poe nods, blinking rapidly, his eyes trained on Ben’s.

“I want what we have to be real, I can’t…” Ben released the elf and dropped to the floor, He closed his eyes and turned again to see the elf, who was now looking at him with more curiosity than fear “I need…. I just… I want it to be only between her and me, and if you interfere… I need it to be real. Please”

“We weren’t going to do anything to break you apart I swear, we just thought─”

“Poe, what did I say? Leave Rey alone, do not follow us, do not spy on us. It’s my one command before taking whatever job you’ve forced upon me.”

Poe flinched at his last words and nodded “Yes sir.”

“Good. Now, could you please take me home?”

“Just one thing sir” Poe said hesitatingly.

“What?” Ben said, pinching the bridge of his nose, hoping it would delay the headache he was sure to have after this interaction.

“You need to take the book of names.” He said, pointing at the book Ben had been about to crack open moments before.

“And… you have to check it… twice” Poe’s smile made it hard to stay angry at him. He obviously cared a lot about this.

This didn’t stop him from rolling his eyes at the implication. Taking the book from the desk a familiar song began playing inside his head.

_He’s making a list,_

_And checking it twice…_

Wonderful.

++++++++++

The day with Ben at the amusement park had been a great success, she had laughed more than she could remember doing in her entire life. She had made him promise they would try every single ride that was open. That included one that was known for ending with its riders completely soaked.

They tried that one last.

The next morning she woke to an apartment littered with wet clothes, hastily thrown all around the room, the last garments cast just outside his bedroom door. Where Rey had insisted she wanted to keep riding, only something very different this time.

++++++++++

April turned into May, and with it came the promises of rainy afternoons spent inside, cuddling under blanket watching movies and eating snacks.

They had settled on a comfortable routine, alternating between staying at her place or his, depending on their needs for the next day. More often than not Ben would wake beside Rey, and when he didn’t, her absence would feel like a phantom pain, begging him to fix the mistake and run to her arms.

During a weekend they decided to spend in a cabin in the forest, Rey had shared a part of her that so far had remained a mystery for him.

Up until then he didn’t know the extent of the pain and suffering both she and Hux had gone through while they were still inside the foster system back in the UK. The rage Ben felt while listening to her story was unlike anything he had ever experienced before. He wanted more than anything else to be able to go back in time and fight for that little girl, scared and alone, who had been abandoned by the people she was supposed to trust most and let down by those entrusted with her care.

It was a weekend where feelings ran wild, where they bared their souls, and explored their bodies, basking in the warmth irradiated by the flaming logs at the fireplace.

It was there, while he held her so close, he could feel their hearts almost beating as one, that he found the courage to tell her that he loved her. It was a moment he knew he would remember for the rest of his life, when her face lit up at his confession and with a voice brimming with adoration told him that she loved him too.

++++++++++

Over and over again Ben found himself on the verge of telling Rey the truth about his future, only to lose his courage at the last minute. ‘ _Later’_ he would tell himself, but later never arrived. They drove back to Chandrila and Rey still had no idea Ben was to become the future Santa Claus.

June brought the end of the school year, and with it more time for them to spend together. Every weekend during July and August they went to the beach, sometimes alone, sometimes with Amy on tow. Ben managed to forget all about his duties, until one September morning when there was a knock on his door.

He sauntered his way to his front door, yawning and stretching, still groggy and slightly pissed off at being roused from what had been a fantastically vivid dream. He adjusted himself inside his sleeping pants, a part of his anatomy still clinging to the last images his resting brain had conjured.

After seeing three familiar faces through the peephole, he rested his forehead on the door wondering if maybe he could pretend he wasn’t home and get away with it.

“We know you’re in there” Rose’s stern voice yelled from the other side. “We could be inside if we wanted to you know? We’re being respectful. Now quit being an ass and open the door. _Boss_.” the last word was thrown with such contempt it made him wince.

“Rose…” Finn warned in a low voice, not low enough so Ben couldn’t hear it through the door.

“What? He doesn’t get to get away with being a di─”

Ben opened the door and was privy to the moment when Jess slapped her hand over Rose’s mouth stopping her from finishing the insult.

“Hello” he greeted, hoping it didn’t sound harsh. No matter how tired he was, the elves didn’t deserve his morning irritable mood.

“Are you letting us in?” Rose asked, impatiently tapping her right foot on the floor.

“Forgive her Sant─” Finn stopped when he caught Ben’s glare, then cleared his throat before continuing “Sorry boss, it’ll take some getting used to not calling you… that word.”

Ben knew he was probably being ridiculous, but there were some lines he would not cross. Being called Santa on a daily basis was one of them. He’d decided to consider it as a stage name. He could be Santa one day a year. The rest of the time he would remain Ben Solo. Whether the elves liked it or not.

He moved aside and watched the little people file into his flat without a word.

“My name is Benjamin Solo” he said, calling their attention back to himself. “I will only be called… _that_ one day a year. And not by you, to you I’m Ben. The same will apply to whoever goes there with me” he warned.

All three of them stared at him with wide eyes, nodding in understanding. He walked around them and sat on his armchair, leaning back while Jess and Finn sat on the sofa. Rose stood still; her face had softened somewhat though her arms were still crossed.

“Rey Solo does sound nice” she said with a knowing smile.

Jess gasped and asked excitedly “You finally told her??”

“We have to see the ring! Tell us everything!” Finn cried in a high-pitched voice, a sharp contrast to his usually grave tone.

The three crowded him in an instant. Feeling frustrated he covered his face with his hands and growled while they kept asking him all sorts of questions about Rey he pretended not to listen.

“Do any of you know what ‘personal boundaries’ are? Or what ‘privacy’ means? Have all of you being spying on us?” He asked, standing from his sear, his considerable height suddenly towering over the elves, Finn and Jess scurried away from him.

“Well, no” Rose said with a frown. She was the only one that remained in her place. “Mostly Poe… sometimes Finn”

“Rose!!” Finn cried from behind the armrest.

“What? It’s the truth” she said dismissively “But they’re not doing it anymore boss, I can vouch for that.”

Ben was impressed, she stood her ground even though he was at least three feet taller than her. She wasn’t easily intimidated, he respected that.

“Me too” Jess said coming out of her hiding spot. “Poe is being grumpier than usual not knowing how you’re doing on that end.”

“You don’t have to know, it’s none of your business” he clarified.

“It kind of is” Finn said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

“It’s not! End of discussion, I won’t have you meddling with my personal life.”

Ben stomped towards the kitchen, not sure if he was annoyed about their meddling or the fact that they clearly didn’t think he could woo Rey on his own.

“Fine, fine, still… if you ever need help…” Jess said from the kitchen foyer.

_Of course they followed._ He thought, pouring water into the coffee maker’s reservoir, then pulling his ground coffee from the cupboard.

“I won’t” He was aware of how petulant he sounded, but the elves were getting on his nerves. It was nothing short of a miracle that he hadn’t throttled any of them yet. Specially Poe. Good thing he had refrained from showing up this time.

“Sure” the three said in unison, one by one climbing on top of the tall chair from his breakfast table and staring at him while he scooped an extra spoonful of coffee into the filter basket.

“So…” Finn said, more confidently than before. “About the list”

Ben froze. The gentle burble of his coffee being made the only sound filling the room “What list?” he asked, though he knew perfectly well what the elf was talking about.

He didn’t have to look at them to know they rolled their eyes at him.

“The list of names? You know, naughty, nice, all that. Did you check _the_ _list_?” Finn asked, leaning over the counter to be closer to Ben, probably an attempt to make him uncomfortable. It worked.

Ben swallowed nervously and rubbed the back of his neck. Pulling an empty mug from his cupboard, he set it in front of him and ran hand through his hair before turning to address the intruders.

“Well…”

“Oh shit!” Finn cursed, throwing his hands in the air and slumping back on the chair “You didn’t check the damn list?! It’s already September! We won’t be able to make it.”

“I’ll do it today─”

“God damn it!” Finn yelled ignoring his attempt at fixing the situation “We are supposed to be back today with the book to begin preparations. Checking the list will take you more than one day!”

“But… I have a date… today.”

“Oww” Rose cooed, with what he thought was understanding and forgiveness.

“We don’t give a fuck _boss_ ” she continued; her face now enraged “Millions of children are counting on us to have their gifts ready in time for Christmas. You might not give a shit, but we do.”

The silence that followed was heavy with resentment. They didn’t like his attitude towards a job that was so important to them. He didn’t feel they understood what they were asking of him.

Ben wanted to tell Rey everything, he wanted her to share this terrifying journey with him, she was the one. He was certain of it. It was this precisely, that stopped him from telling her about this. About being _Santa_. He didn’t want to ask her to choose between her life at Chandrila and him. Because he wasn’t sure she’d choose him, and he didn’t think he could survive her rejection.

“Listen Ben” Finn said calmly, “We get it, we aren’t idiots. We know it’s a lot. But please… we need you to help us. You know we can’t do everything.”

Ben felt a lump in his throat, couldn’t find any words to say so he only nodded.

“We’ll come back in a couple of days… please could you check the list by then?”

“I will” he said, his voice cracking in the end.

The tears that filled his eyes weren’t about disappointing the elves, he didn’t feel sorry about that. He wasn’t getting emotional over his future role in his favourite holiday. His despair stemmed from an idea, one simple thought that plagued his head the moment he saw the elves at the door that morning.

He had to tell Rey everything.

He would have to explain the ridiculousness of his situation and hope she would believe him. And then that she would choose him over everything she had here. His chances of things going the way he wanted them to go were next to none. He wasn’t an idiot.

That was what brought tears to his eyes and despair to his soul. The thought that he might have to go on without her.

That possibility broke his heart.

++++++++++

It’s unbelievable how early most shops start selling Christmas decorations. Every year they seem to be coming out earlier and Rey hates it. It’s mid-October and some shops are already brimming with them.

She loathes the stupid stockings with ridiculous figures on them, and the tacky tinsel that seems to cover every ledge everywhere when the festive season starts getting closer. She despises all the sappy overplayed holiday songs and gaudy trees that appear everywhere humans congregate. 

But most of all, she hates the hypocrisy of the whole thing. Why is it that people suddenly feel the need to be _good_ and _kind_ to others during the Christmas period? Why can’t they be like that all year long? What makes Christmas special?

_Ugh_.

She glances at her side and sees Ben’s pensive face. He hasn’t said anything in a while, in fact, the past couple of weeks he has been different.

She wonders if maybe she’s driving him away with her standoffish attitude towards everything even remotely festive. She remembers how passionately he defended his niece’s right to believe in a myth.

Because Santa wasn’t real. Rey was sure of that.

They walked hand in hand into the log cabin that served as an entrance to the apple orchard he’d chosen as setting for their date today.

Earlier that week she had told him how much she loved apple crumble, as it had been the first thing she’d tried after she arrived in America. He’d insisted on bringing her here so they could pick their own apples before driving home to bake some apple crumble. He knew his grandmother Padme’s recipe by heart and swore it was the most delicious thing ever.

She’d had to fight the urge to pull him down and smother him with kisses, and yet his expression had stayed almost impassive, even though he had just offered to do something ridiculously romantic for her.

The trees were loaded with beautiful crimson apples, rows after rows of the lush trees waiting for them to release some of their burden. She picked some from the lower branches, but it was up to Ben, due to his impressive height, to get the ones that seemed out of reach.

“Ben?” she asked, enjoying the view of his whole body stretching to get a bright red apple that hung a couple of feet above his head.

“Yes sweetheart?” He answered, his voice a little strained from the effort. He picked the fruit before she was able to gather her thoughts to figure out how to approach the subject.

She swung the heavy basket slightly, switching her weight between her feet, looking at the grass as if it could tell her the best way to ask the man she loved what was bothering him. It should be easy, there were no secrets between them, except for the reason to her antipathy towards Christmas, Ben knew her through and through.

“Is everything ok?” he asked, while placing the apple he’d just cut with the rest inside their basket.

“Of course, let’s go home so we can bake a massive apple crumble.”

His laugh was something inexplicable, it was deep and sultry, infused with so much humour and happiness, it never failed to make her body tingle. It was a sound she could listen for the rest of her life and never tire. 

Though their hands had remained intertwined during the entire drive home, it had been spent mostly in silence.

“Ben?”

“Huh?” he answered absentmindedly, staring at their still baking apple crumble through the oven door.

“I need to tell you something.”

He looked up and his frightened expression made her heart hurt. She had avoided the dreaded ‘We need to talk’ because it could give him the wrong idea. It wasn’t until he looked up from where he was crouching in front of the oven that she realised it was her tone, not so much the words, that could give the wrong idea.

“It’s just… I feel like you’ve been a bit distant lately and─”

He stood immediately. “Rey─” he said, but she had to continue before she lost her nerve.

“No, please let me explain. I’m sorry if I’ve been weird lately.” His face went from frightened to confused to something in between.

“It’s just…” She took a deep breath before explaining one of her most ingrained traumas, one that she probably should’ve talked through with a therapist but hadn’t and now she was being ridiculous in front of the love of her life.

“I know it’s still a few months away. It’s just... every year people start getting Christmassy earlier and I just… I hate it.” She swallowed and waited to see his expression. His face fell, her stomach churned, she never thought this could be such a big deal. Then again, she never thought she would fall in love with a man who routinely dressed as Santa Claus at Christmas to entertain his niece.

“Oh…”

“I’m sorry… I know you love it─”

“I understand” he interrupted, running his hand through his hair, something he did when he was nervous “We don’t have to do anything Christmassy if it makes you uncomfortable” his voice broke a little and the pain behind it made her wonder if maybe she could pretend.

He deserved more than just pretend. She could work on her problem, but he had to know the reason why Christmas wasn’t something she enjoyed.

“It’s just… when I was little” she began to explain, taking his hands in hers and leading him to the sofa, so they could sit while she related her story.

“When I was little, I loved it. I wrote my letter to Santa every Christmas, Armie and I would spend hours decorating whatever piece of paper we found that year to write” a tiny smile formed at the memory. His hand gave her a gentle squeeze, encouraging her to continue.

“Every morning we would wake super excited, hoping to find at least one present under the tree─” It was then that her voice failed her, she wiped a tear that threatened to fall, purposefully looking away from Ben so she wouldn’t break into a sobbing mess.

“It’s stupid I know. Santa is _not_ real. And without any parents of course I would never get any gifts. It’s just…”

“It’s not stupid… it broke your heart” He whispered. His thumb caressing the back of her hand, a gesture at odds with how he avoided her eyes.

“I’m so sorry Ben, I know how important it is to you. I will try, it might take time, I know... I just don’t want you to be disappointed. I love you so much.” she sighed and let him pull her into his lap, his arms circling her, moulding perfectly around her. She still couldn’t believe how well they fit together. She felt safe in his arms and wanted nothing more than to remain there forever, his hand caressing her back, her fingers playing with the locks of hair on his nape.

Locked like this, with her lips on his neck, trying to reassure him she was his and forever would be, she couldn’t see his eyes fill with tears, or the despair that was evident in his face.

She didn’t know she had asked for time he didn’t have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if the last scene of this counts as angst, if it does, please let me know so I can tag accordingly. Thank you!   
> Hope I can finish this soon. I already have an idea for another one 😈 [insert evil laugh]


	8. The one where the truth comes out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The elves want to help. Ben comes up with a plan, then has to improvise. He didn't follow Ru's advice and sadly DID fuck it up.

The binoculars he had been holding were snatched from him by a figure clad in grey, the jingle from her shoes alerting him of her position. He still couldn’t dodge the blow aimed to his head.

“God damn it Poe we aren’t supposed to spy on him!” fumed Rose, brandishing the stolen binoculars in his face.

“I wasn’t spying. He’s an idiot anyway” he retorted, annoyed at everyone’s insistence to take his concern as an invasion of the new Santa’s privacy.

“You did not just say that about Santa.” Finn gasped exaggeratedly.

“He’ll give you the death glare if he hears you calling him that.” Jess warned with a chuckle.

“He’s an idiot and I’ll prove it.” Poe insisted, stepping away from the group that had ambushed him at his return to the north pole and walking to his office. “The man will pine forever instead of doing something to help her believe again.”

Yes, Poe wanted to help Ben Solo. Sure, there was a tinge of selfishness in his efforts. He took one look at the man and knew it would be a nightmare to work with such an unhappy and lonely human. But he also wanted the man to enjoy his life. And this woman, Rey, seemed to be a perfect match.

Only problem was, she did _not_ believe in Christmas magic. In fact, she _hated_ Christmas. Not that he could blame her, considering what she’d gone through.

“How can he help if he doesn’t even know why she stopped believing in the first place” complained Finn, Rose and Jess nodding in agreement a few paces behind.

Poe glared at him. “She _told_ him the other day, you were there” He reminded the younger elf.

“I knew it!! You’ve been spying on him!” accused Rose from behind the pair. Though she was slightly shorter than them, she moved just as fast. Plus, she was relentless in her quest to scold Poe for interfering with their new boss’s life.

They walked into Poe’s office and Jess closed the door behind her. Poe was pacing back and forth in front of his desk, trying to figure out a way to tell the group the truth about Rey.

“You said that wasn’t all that happened” whispered Finn.

“You two, shut up!” Poe growled, finally losing his patience. Jess snickered from a corner while munching on caramel popcorn.

“She was a kid who never got any gifts, of course she stopped believing in Santa” snapped Poe, pinching the bridge of his nose and leaning on his desk.

Finn rolled his eyes, “Well… yes we know, that’s what _she_ told him.”

“Yes, but what you don’t know is that the real problem was her damned foster father. That miserable bastard.”

“What did he do?” Jess asked, suddenly very serious, all traces of her previous enjoyment of the argument gone. All eyes were on Poe, waiting for an explanation.

“Every year, before she woke, he would take her gifts from under the tree to sell them later.”

The horrified looks on the elves faces switched to anger during the silence that followed.

“We should kill him” Rose proposed, her expression had darkened considerably and for the first time Poe wondered if maybe she wasn’t joking.

“We’re Christmas elves Rose…” mumbled Finn.

“So what? We won’t do it in front of children”

A nervous chuckle escaped Jess before she cleared her throat and asked, “Should we tell her?”.

“Do you really think she’ll believe us?” questioned Poe.

Rose took a deep breath and with shared a look of understanding with Finn and Jess before saying, “We need a plan”.

“Does that mean you’re in?” Poe asked, his eyes full of hope.

“Well… you saw how that sappy giant looks at her. We _have_ to help.”

++++++++++

Over the next couple of weeks Amy had been staying with Ben more often than usual. With Kay busy with the final details of her thesis and getting ready for her certification, and Han and Leia out of town again, enjoying what Han called ‘the last useful years of their lives’, Ben was left as the only adult who could take care of the feisty girl.

She was colouring the drawing she’d made that day in class for her homework when she looked up and blurted a question he hadn’t anticipated.

“Uncle Ben, who will take care of me when you leave to the North Pole?”

Ben’s chest tightened, the weight of Amy’s question making it difficult to breathe. He couldn’t lie to her. No matter how much he wanted to tell her that he was not going anywhere, the truth was that in three weeks he would have to move to a place he had never gone to, conscious, before.

“I’m sure I can find a way to visit. Besides, your mummy will be with you so much you won’t even have time to miss me”.

God, he hoped that was true. Kay had promised so. She had vowed that after finishing her training she would take a job with better hours to give more time to Amy.

“I think I’ll miss you anyway uncle Ben”

Ben had to fight the lump in his throat to answer, “I’ll miss you too little one, maybe I’ll leave one of the reindeer here so you can come up whenever you want”.

She opened her mouth to answer but closed it immediately. Her eyes darted to a corner of the room and went wide, a goofy smile replacing the sad one she’d sported before.

“Poe!” she screamed, jumping from her seat, running towards the elf that was now standing beside the one potted plant that he had to bring some life into his otherwise barren home.

“Hey munchkin! Long time no see. Has your grump of an uncle been keeping you away from us?” he beamed as he tickled the girl, who squealed and laughed.

“What is it Poe?” Ben asked warily. The effect of his conversation with Amy was harder for him to shake, the guilt it made him feel still clinging to his soul.

“Easy big guy, I’m here in peace” Poe lifted his hands in mock surrender, his shoulders shaking slightly with his laugh.

“Poe look! I made a drawing of you!” bubbled Amy as she excitedly ran towards the desk where she had been colouring just minutes ago.

“I’m honoured miss Amy, you are truly an amazing artist” Poe complimented Amy, making a reverence that made her laugh.

Ben was about to ask if she had finished her homework before she started drawing Poe when Finn, Rose and Jess appeared. Amy’s cries of delight derailing his questions about her school duties.

“Can we talk boss?” Rose asked shyly, a rather unusual attitude for the girl.

“Poe is a great babysitter, mainly because only children don’t find him annoying” Jess added when he hesitated.

“Ok”

He followed Rose down the hall, towards the door that led to a small terrace. The only place where they could be out of earshot of Amy. Whatever the elves wanted to talk to him about was so secret they would brave the cold to talk. _Not that they’ll feel cold_ he thought. _They live in the North Pole._

Rose took a deep breath and looked at her friends before addressing him. “First, we want to make it clear that everything Poe does, no matter how annoying or ill-advised, he does it because he cares”.

She seemed to want to say more, however she let her words sink in. It didn’t take him log to understand their meaning.

“He’s been following me, hasn’t he?”

Rose winced; it was Finn who spoke “Well…”.

“God damn─”

“Look we know why Rey doesn’t believe!” Jess cut in before Ben could go on with his rant about the meaning of privacy one more time.

“Yes, I know! She never got any presents!” Ben uttered, already exasperated by the elves. “I thought you didn’t forget any child!” he accused.

“We don’t”

“But Rey─”

“Got her presents stolen by her foster father”.

Rose’s words hit him hard. He took a step backwards and tried his best to remain impassive but failed miserably. He was so angry at whoever hurt Rey so deeply she had lost her ability to believe in something so magical and pure as Christmas.

“So did Armitage Hux, and all the children from that household” lamented Finn, as he looked over the railing, down the street. 

It was Rose who broke the silence. “I had no idea; I would’ve killed the arsehole…”

It was just what he needed to hear in that moment, the image of a miniscule Rose viciously attacking a grown man made him burst out laughing.

“Hey! What are you laughing at? I mean it” whined Rose.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry. I agree with you though. I just think it’s not a very Christmassy solution”.

“There are lots of thing you still have to learn about this business Ben, you will in time. Right now though, I think you need some help helping Rey believe again” Jess said, a knowing look in her eyes.

Ben’s mood lift began to die down, the reminder of his task bringing a familiar pang to his chest. One that hadn’t left him since it dawned on him that a life with Rey wasn’t a given.

++++++++++

While Ben spoke to the other elves, Amy decided to question Poe about her uncle’s future in the North Pole. He told her about the constant stream of freshly baked cookies that kept all the workshop workers going through the most intense days of pre-Christmas toy making. How it would be her uncle’s duty to keep an eye on every step of the process.

She asked if uncle Ben would get a huge belly, Poe told her only if he allowed himself to, apparently they did have healthy food up there. She asked if he’d be lonely or if he would be allowed to take Miss Rey with him, Poe assured her they were doing everything in their power to ensure he wouldn’t be lonely. 

“Poe…” she whispered, unsure if she should ask the one question that had been bothering the most. “Can I ask one more thing?”

Poe noticed her struggle and his expression shifted; he could sense this was a sensitive subject for the girl. “Sure thing, as many questions as you want”.

“What will happen to me? I’ll be alone” her voice broke a little at the end, her eyes filled with tears.

Poe considered his words carefully. He now could see the huge sacrifice the girl had made when she encouraged her uncle to save Christmas.

“You’ll never be alone Amy, your mum will be with you, and your grandparents”.

This didn’t seem to convince Amy, who nodded and looked down, tears finally rolling down her rosy cheeks.

“However…” he said, plunging his hand inside the bag he always carried with him “I know how much you love your uncle, and I bet you’ll miss him a lot”

Amy looked up, her big bright blue eyes glazed with unshed tears, it broke Poe’s heart to see her like that. He pulled a snow globe from his bag, roughly the size of his fist. Their village in the north pole was inside it, a surprisingly detailed work for such a small scale.

“This is a magical snow-globe, we had it made for you so you can see your uncle whenever you want”.

“Really?”

“Yes, really. All you have to do is shake it and he’ll appear”.

“Like the genie from Aladdin?” she asked, wiping her tears and taking the sphere I her hands.

“Yes, but without the three-wish limit”

He watched Amy while she examined the artifact. Turning it over and over, tracing the golden details from the base with her finger.

“Keep it safe Amy, and remember you are _never_ alone”.

++++++++++

It’s not until the first week of November when Ben finally decides to tell Rey about the whole Christmas business.

They woke that morning, limbs tangled under the duvet, their naked bodies requiring the extra layer of protection against the cold. With Rey draped around him, her hair falling over his shoulder, listening to her snoring softly, he felt complete.

He stared at her while she slept, knowing that it was a weird thing to do. He couldn’t help himself, he _needed_ to memorize the shape of every freckle, the warmth of her breath on his chest, the feeling of her weight over him. She was everything he had ever dreamed of and today… today he might lose it all. Ever the pessimist, Ben didn’t expect her to stay. He’d gone over his speech again and again and no matter how he phrased it still sounded insane, even to himself. 

Just when he was about to go over the precipice to drown in his fatalistic thoughts she stirred, her nose scrunching in that adorable way it did every time she woke. Her eyes flickered, and she smiled at him. That radiant, soul warming smile that made his heart flutter.

“Good morning darling” she mumbled, rolling to her side of the bed and stretching her limbs.

“Good morning sweetheart”

He watched her as she got out of bed and put on the shirt she had almost ripped off him the day before. Nothing else. She looked over her shoulder and winked at him before sauntering to the kitchen, he laughed despite his previously gloomy mood, her flirtations coaxing him out of bed. He tripped on his own feet in his haste to go after her.

They had been practically living together for almost a month now. Most of her things had found their way into his closet, and although they hadn’t talked about it properly, things flowed naturally in that direction. Ben felt as if they had been together forever.

He wore nothing but an apron while he made pancakes for breakfast. Rey had casually mentioned she enjoyed watching him do so, and every weekend he pleased her.

They ate in comfortable silence, stealing glances of each other and giggling like the idiots in love that they were. Once their hunger was quenched, they stumbled into their bed again, giving into their desires of being as close as humanly possible. Only after they had both found their sweet release, melting into the other until they had no idea where one started and the other ended, only then they left their bed.

Baring the marks of her nails on his back, and with what most certainly was the dopiest smile on earth, he pulled her with him into the shower, where they joined again, dancing rhythmically until they cried as one in ecstasy.

It was easy to forget about everything else when they were together because, when she was by his side, nothing else mattered.

Being the weekend before thanksgiving, Ben was dangerously close to his deadline. Time was running out and he was still too scared to tell her.

While walking through the house cleaning supplies aisle at the local supermarket, he decides to test the waters in what he would later admit was the stupidest way possible.

“So… hypothetically… if I got a job offer up north. Like far, far, away… would you come with me?”.

Rey stopped in her tracks and turned around to face him. Her quizzical brow made him want to backtrack immediately, yet her small smile soothed him enough to stand his ground. He had to do this eventually, what better time than the now.

“Hypothetically huh? Uhm…” she pretended to consider his question seriously. He knew her well enough to know she was taking it as a joke. “How far away?”

“Way north” he said, trying to keep himself from showing how nervous this conversation was making him.

“Canada?”

“North…er”

Her smile disappeared, and his heart sank.

“North of Canada is just the north pole, what are you saying? That will you be working for Santa?” she deadpanned.

Ben had no idea what to say next. It was obvious she didn’t think this conversation was funny anymore. He had fucked up his attempt to come clean, making her believe he was joking and then going into a touchy subject for her.

“Do you… can I ask you something about Christmas?” he asked shyly.

“Go on”.

“Do you… remember what the last thing was you asked for? In a Christmas letter I mean”

“I…” she swallowed nervously and turned away from him.

He thought that was it, she wouldn’t answer. He didn’t blame her, her childhood was a wound that was still healing, even after all these years.

Then she surprised him when, in a whisper, she confessed.

“It was a doll. I don’t remember the name exactly… Why?”.

He could see her eyes beginning to cloud with tears and couldn’t bring himself to continue with his questions. Whatever plan he had come up with the elves had vanished from his memory.

“I don’t know… it doesn’t matter”.

He shook his head, pushing their cart to the next aisle, hoping the conversation would be forgotten.

“Oh come on Ben, you can’t just ask me something like that out of nowhere and not expect me to ask why”

He didn’t stop when he assured her it wasn’t important, keeping his focus on finding the brand of bread she liked.

“Ben, I know you” she rested her hand on his forearm, forcing him to face her and look into her eyes “You don’t have to give me what I didn’t receive as a child. I am trying to let go like I promised, I really am”.

“I’m sorry” he breathed.

“It’s alright… c’mon, we’re out of fruity pebbles”.

The conversation ended, he followed her to the aisle where all the cereals were. Unaware of the four pairs of eyes that were observing them from a distance. Disappointed by what they saw, the elves resolved to take matters into their own hands.

++++++++++++

Stared at the object that was resting over her bed with wide unbelieving eyes.

She had gone to her flat, which she hadn’t visited in almost a week, to get one of the last remining object still tucked deep inside her kitchen cabinets. A turkey shaped cookie cutter that Ben had begged for her to get, to bake the cookies they would take to Leia and Han’s tonight. He had stayed home preparing everything else, they would not only make cookies, but also the pumpkin pies and cranberry sauce.

She didn’t share his love for cooking, but she loved to help.

Once inside the flat, something told her she should at least check her room was empty. She didn’t know exactly why, Ben hadn’t said anything, but she had planned on driving by on Sunday to get whatever she’d missed.

With her lease ending in four days, she was due to return her keys to her landlord the Monday after today.

That’s how she found the box over her mattress.

A pink box with plastic front showing the wiry doll she had wanted so much when she was little. A brand-new Betty Spaghetty stared at her, sitting on her pink bike, wearing a green helmet that covered her yellow haired head. A cute white dog in the back.

She never thought she would see one of those, in fact she had forgotten they even existed, until she saw the one she was now holding.

She wanted to be grateful, she really did. She wanted to feel warm and fuzzy about the fact that her boyfriend had gone to such lengths to find the doll. Somehow all she felt was anger.

She had asked him for time, she told him she was trying. This felt like he was pushing her.

One question remained; how did he know? She never told him about Betty, she didn’t even remember herself.

Leaving everything in her apartment, the cookie cutter forgotten, she drove back to Ben’s looking for an explanation.

“Hey sweetheart, did you find it?”

Ben answered the door wearing his red apron, now lightly dusted with flour, and she almost forgot why she was angry. She loved him so much. However, the feeling of being pushed to do something she had no control over won, and her anger returned. 

“So it _was_ you?” she questioned, her tone a bit too harsh. _Too late to back down now._

“What?”

For some reason that enraged her further, pretending not to know what she was talking about. She pushed past him into their flat and took Betty’s box out from the bag.

“This was in my flat, who put it there? Only you and I have a key to that place Ben”.

“I didn’t─”

“Save it Ben” she interjected.

His look of utter confusion helped her mood simmer down somewhat. She sighed and looked at the door. It was a nice gesture after all.

“I know you mean well but I told you, I told you to back off and give me time”.

“Rey─”

“How did you know?” she asked before he could say something that would make her swoon. He did that often, she wouldn’t allow it today.

When he stayed silent, his face impassive, his eyes boring into her trying to find she had no idea what, she felt slightly anxious. It looked like he was trying to decide whether to tell her something or not.

“Ben?”

“Last Christmas” he finally said, running his hand through his hair “While I was staying in Kay’s house with Amy… well something happened and─”

“What does that have to do with this?” she huffed.

“I… well, now I’m Santa Claus”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Full disclosure and explanation about some of the things I wrote and why. Last Christmas my sister and I decided to do an advent calendar movie challenge, we watched one Christmas movie a day starting the 1st of December. Because I didn’t want to watch 24 sappy, corny, over the top Christmas movies I did some research and included some unusual choices (horror, action, drama etc.), one of the weird ones was this action movie I found called ‘Fatman’, from Ian and Eshom Nelms, starring Mel Gibson and Marianne Jean-Baptiste. In it Santa is this badass dude who defends his toy factory against an assassin. I thought the idea was cool and wanted to extend that badassery to the elves as well, especially Rose (because I just adore her). Anyway I know the idea of an idillyc santa village is sweet, with nothing ever going wrong, but I choose to believe Santa (and his elves) would also be willing to protect Christmas in a cool action figure kind of way. Especially if Ben Solo is Santa. Also if Rey is Mrs. Clause (don’t get me started on the fact that she doesn’t have a first name) I think it’s a given she’d be just as cool as Santa. Maybe more.  
> That’s another thing I liked about Fatman, Mrs. Claus has a name (Ruth). The whole name thing is also why I wanted Ben to make it clear that he doesn’t want to be called Santa, but that he would use it as a stage name. That allows them to stay Ben and Rey Solo (or Ben Solo and Rey Kenobi if they so choose, you decide) instead of Santa and Mrs. Clause.   
> (I swear I didn’t overthink this. At all.)  
> One more thing, there’s this movie, a christmas musical with zombies (I know) that is amazing! It’s called ‘Anna and the Apocalypse’ in case you want to check it out.


End file.
